


Whiskey Lullabies

by HardiganCaptain



Category: Warrior (2011)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-08-27
Updated: 2014-02-05
Packaged: 2017-12-24 20:49:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 29,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/944491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HardiganCaptain/pseuds/HardiganCaptain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tommy and his mother moved to Tacoma, WA to get away from his abusive father. What he hadn't expected was to fall head over heels for a girl who had a song for everything, and the patience and light heartedness to pull him out of the darkest fits of temper. [set pre Warrior and through]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**_O Light of Light, keep me this night, and shed round me Thy presence bright._ **

_He could feel cool fingertips brush the hair from his forehead, smooth over his eyebrow before sliding along his cheek to cup his jaw. Lips curling into a sleepy smile, he murmured in his sleep as he shifted restlessly, the blanket tugged lower as he half rolled to his side. Vanilla and spice filled his nose as he took a deep breath, a hint of something else on the back of his tongue. Throwing himself onto his stomach, he burrowed his face into his pillow, his shoulders shifting as the cool touch ran down his spine._

**_I need not fear If Thou art near; Thou art my Savior kind and dear._ **

_Eyes opening slowly, he turned his head and blinked at the clock on the nightstand, pushing the half empty bottle out of the way to see more clearly. An hour of sleep. Rubbing his eyes he dragged the blanket back up over his shoulders, school wasn’t for another five hours, and he felt sick as a dog from lack of sleep._

_A soft sound caught his attention, a low cough that made his stomach twist even as he rolled out of bed. Feet unsteady, he stumbled down the hallway as he tried to rub his burning eyes, the sounds of the coughs wet and thick._

_"Mom?"_

_Peering into the dimly lit room, he ignored the soft hush of the humidifier, the medicinal smell in the air, and moved to sit on the edge of the bed as he grabbed the jar from the headboard. His nose wrinkled at the slick feel of it on his fingers, holding his breath as he slowly rubbed it onto her chest, spreading it along her collarbone and down her sternum._

_"Did I, did I wake you?" Her voice was a light rasp, thin fingers closing over his wrist as she lifted his hand to kiss the back of it. "I’m sorry, sweetie."_

_"Nah, it’s okay. I was up anyway, y’know?"_

_"You should be sleeping, you have school in a few hours. It’s not your job to-" she stopped abruptly, her head falling to the side as she lifted her hand to cover her cough. "Go back to bed. I’ll be fine."_

_"Don’t worry ‘bout it. Really, I don’t mind."_

Sitting up, he scrubbed his hands over his face and took a shaky breath before staring without seeing across the room. He missed her, who she used to be before the illness had slowly worked it's way through her body and ravaged it down to little more than a empty husk, the shining light at the end of every nightmare. Throwing the covers aside, he slid off the bed and wandered down the hallway to her room, his fingers curling around the doorknob before going still.

He didn't want to go into the room, the soft wheeze echoing in his ear, the dull listless look in her eyes hovering in his mind's eye. For a moment he let his rage fill him. Not at her, but everyone else. 

The hospitals that required more than he was able to pay. The factory job he'd conned his way into to keep a roof over their heads. His father for driving them away, with drunken slurs and heavy fists. His older brother who had left them hanging, left them to fend for themselves while he wandered off wearing rose tinted glasses. 

Swallowing it down, he leaned forward to rest his head against the door, feeling tears prick the backs of his eyes before brushing them away. He was so angry all the time, and he still had to smile and pretend that everything was alright. That he was just a fifteen year old boy like everyone else. Went to school, did his homework when he felt like it. Not the boy who had to pretend to be a man. Worked ten to twelve hour shifts on the week days, nursed his dying mother so she could at least pass on as comfortable as he could make her.

The tattered wall paper behind the headboard made his throat tighten, the other three were covered in pictures. From magazines, covers of books, anything he could think of that would make her smile when she looked at them. As he stepped into the room he almost gagged, the heavy air clogging his lungs, but he smiled anyways, just in case. Her eyes flickered open, staring sightlessly up at the ceiling before turning her head to look at him.

"Hey, sweetie." Her voice wasn't half as strong as it had been even a month ago, but the warmth of her smile hadn't changed at all.

"You hungry or somethin'? I could make you somethin' to eat before school."

"No, no, it's fine."

"You sure?" He felt his heart stutter when she coughed weakly, barely able to bring her hand to her mouth. "Maybe some tea or somethin'."

An hour, two cups of tea shared, and a weak armed hug later found him sitting on the bus. He could hear the sounds of enthusiastic conversations, raucous laughter, and everything else that normal kids did, but his gaze was locked outside the window.

"Tommy! Tommy!"

Looking up, he grinned at the enthusiastic waving of a girl as she clambered up the bus steps. Hand shoving at the kid sitting next to him, he slid out of the seat to give her the window. He smacked her backpack when it hit his side, sitting down beside her and trying to fend off the hug and kiss on the cheek she tried to give him.

"Don't be so grumpy, God." 

"Quit kissin' on me then." He wiped his cheek with the back of his hand as he gave her a reproachful look. "Why you always doin' that, anyways?"

"Because I like-" she paused at the horrified look on his face, laughing before she finished the sentence. "To torment you. The look on your face. Did you think I was going to admit I was in like with you?"

"No! I was just," scowling when she kept laughing, he rubbed his cheek again. "I swear if little sisters are like you, I'm glad I ain't got one."

"Shut up, you love me and you know it."

Eyeing her suspiciously, he let out a sigh of relief when she scrambled onto her knees to talk the the girl in the seat behind them, her backpack falling into his lap as she shrugged it off her shoulders. He couldn't remember when he became friends with Melody, he hadn't really been given a choice actually. Scrawny thing, dressed in a lavender sundress that had matched her eyes, had literally used him as a shield from the bullies that had been chasing her. 

He could still feel her fingers tugging on his shirt as she pulled him in front of her, the raven dark hair tangled with a ribbon looking pathetic as it hung listlessly among her curls. It hadn't taken much to scare off the boys that had been teasing her, knocking the biggest one to the ground with a solid southpaw swing had scared off the rest. and then those oddly coloured violet eyes had stared up at him filled with tears before disappearing as she burrowed her face against his chest.

"Tommy? Hey," he rocked to the side as she shoved at him. "You okay?"

"Course I am, what're you askin' for?"

"Is it your mom?" She leaned closer, her voice dropping so low he had to strain to hear it. "Was it bad today?"

"My mom's fine." Pushing her away, he shoved her bag onto her lap and draped his wrists over the back of the seat in front of him. "Well she ain't worse, so there's that, right? I have to get home to make her lunch though."

"You can borrow my bike. I left it at school the other day, so it's still there. Or should be." Resting against his shoulder, she hummed softly beneath her breath. 

"Thanks."

His eyes flicked down at her, her fingers playing with the zipper of her backpack, almost like an accompaniment. Letting out a soft grunt, he shifted feeling her stubbornly match his movement to stay comfortable, the song she was humming filling his ears as he stared out the front window. 

"Hey Tommy?"

"What?" He couldn't help the snap in his tone, his eyes flicking towards her before looking away.

"It'll be okay, Tommy."

"Don't. I hate when people say that shit."

"I know you know we've had some good times, now they have their own hiding place." She grinned when he shot her a dirty look, singing on regardless. "Well I can promise you tomorrow, but I can't buy back yesterday."

"You got a fuckin' song for everythin' don't you?"

"Music's good for you, there isn't a single thing in history that a song can't be linked to."

"Oh yeah?" He was quiet a moment, before smiling as he raised an eyebrow at her. "So I can name anythin' and you can link it to a song?"

"Anything."

They spent the rest of the bus ride throwing events and lyrics back and forth, the game continuing through homeroom before they had to separate for class. He caught himself humming Bon Jovi during his third class and almost choked trying to make himself stop, earning him an odd look from the of kids close to him. Dropping his chin, he curled in on himself, focused on taking notes before catching himself humming again.

She was waiting by the bike rack at lunch time, spinning her key by the string as she watched him expectantly. Shoving his books into her arms after pulling the key from her finger, he unlocked the bike and pulled it out of the rack.

"You going to make it back before the end of the day?"

"Think so."

"If you don't just drop the bike off at my house, okay? I'll leave the garage unlocked." Leaning forward suddenly she pressed a kiss to his cheek, grinning when he scowled at her as she caught his hand. "That one wasn't for you, it's for your mom."

His throat closed tight, his eyes dropping away from hers before muttering thank you under his breath. He stared at the tape she shoved at him confused, taking it and turning it over to look at the label.

"I made her a tape, I know when I feel like crap I like listening to music. I thought it might help."

"Jesus, Mel. You gonna come over and sing her to sleep next?"

"Think she'd like that? I don't think my parents would mind." 

Shaking his head, he tucked the tape into his pocket and straddled the bike. For a moment he gave it a passing thought, he'd heard her in music class when she was singing lead, her voice throaty and easily heard over everything else. Not today though, today had seemed like a bad day when he'd left for school and he still felt guilty for leaving in the first place.

"Maybe tomorrow?" He called over his shoulder, pedalling a circle around her before heading towards the street, his legs pumping as the bike swayed side to side. 

It was fifteen blocks to get home, luckily during a school day the traffic was light and he didn't have to stop for lights or cars. The edge of the tape dug into his thigh every time his leg lifted, reminding him that it was there until he reached home and propped the bike against the railing. His legs felt shaky as he jogged up the steps, shouldering the door open and walking into his mother's room.

"Mom, you awake? I can make you somethin' to eat."

"Just toast would be nice."

He grinned seeing her sitting on the bed, her hairbrush laying on her lap, she looked better than she had all week. Half way across the room he remembered the tape in his pocket, digging in to grab it and hold it up for his mother to see.

"You remember my friend Mel? Made you a tape to listen to if you want."

"That's your girlfriend isn't it? Mel's an odd name for a girl." The smile she sent him only made him scowl at her, moving to push the cassette into the tape player and hitting play.

"No! God Mom, she's just a friend. I ain't got time for a girlfriend, besides she's just bein' nice."

"You're too young to not have time for that sort of thing."

"Mom, c'mon, stop it." Flicking the volume up and hearing static before walking out of the room and to the kitchen. "You're havin' more than toast, you need to eat."

**Are you sure it's on? Yeah? Okay um... So my name is Melody Morgenstern, I'm 15 years old and this is the song I wrote for a friend of mine.**

**You watch the stars, watch them pass you by**   
**I know you wonder why, and you fall so far**   
**Lift up your chin, and wipe away your tears**   
**You've real hard years, but I know in the end you'll win**

**You silly boy, what are you waiting for  
Open up that door, I wanna watch you soar**

Startled, he turned and stared towards the bedroom, the lettuce and tomato in his hands sending chills up his arms as he slowly headed back into his mother's room. The sound of a guitar filled the room, accompanied by soft tapping sounds as she worked her way through the chorus and the second verse.

"She wrote you a love song."

"No she didn't. That ain't no love song, she just worries 'bout me or somethin'."

"Your cheeks are all red, Tommy are you embarassed your girlfriend wrote you a love song?" Her cheeks dimpled as she teased him, the glow under her skin making it hard to get mad. "She's got a lovely voice."

"What? Oh. Yeah, yeah she does. She's always getting lead for the schools music stuff."

"Well deserved."

"She said she'd like to sing for you, but I told her-"

"Yes, you told her yes."

"Mom..."

"You're dripping juice all over the floor, get the tomatoes on a sandwich instead of the carpet." Her fingers wiggled at him as she tugged on her nightgown. "I'll have to find something better than this to wear tomorrow, won't I?"


	2. Chapter 2

He didn't make it back to school before it ended. Embarrassingly enough he fell asleep sprawled out on the foot of his mother's bed, listening to the rest of the tape and trying to ignore her not so subtle interrogation. It was like she'd never heard of girls before, or hadn't met the neighbors, whose daughter she seemed to be dead set on pairing together with her son. After the seventeenth question he'd given up on trying to just respond with low grunts and grudgingly answered her with full sentences. Falling asleep had literally been his mind's defense against having to think about Melody that way, the scowl that had formed on his lips melting away the deeper he'd fallen into slumber.

Half an hour later he was still feeling like an idiot, pushing the bike instead of riding it as he shook off the last remnants of sleep that were clinging to him. There was one good thing about Melody, she never looked at him with pity, not really. When she'd first found out that his mother was sick she'd thrown herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and squeezed so tightly it had hurt even under the onslaught of shock. She hadn't given him the condolences that he was tired of hearing about, and the look in her eyes hadn't been pity, it had been something else that he hadn't been able to place. Then, completing the blindside that she'd started, she changed the subject entirely like it hadn't even been broached. Not that she forgot, as she proved not two weeks later when he was looking as terrible as he felt, but she didn't make a big fuss over it, or try to coddle him.

Propping the bike up against the structure, he bent over to grab the handle for the garage door and frowned when it didn't budge. Nose wrinkling, he squatted down and tried throwing his weight against it, rewarded only with the hollow echo of the door rattling. He couldn't help the frustrated growl, standing to kick at the white metal and leave a dull scuff in its wake. It wasn't necessarily the denied access that was bothering him, not really although it was a nuisance, it was just another excuse to let a bit of his temper leak out on something that could take the damage.

“I don't think you'll get the door open that way, Thomas.” He almost jumped out of skin, whirling around with his hands half cocked before dropping them just as quickly when he realized the speaker was Melody's father.

“Sorry, Mr. Morgenstern, it's just Mel said she'd leave it open so I could put her bike away.” Voice low and sullen, he stared just over the man's shoulder instead of meeting his gaze.

“Losing your temper isn't going to get you anywhere.”

There was the beginnings of a lecture layering the words, Tommy'd heard enough of them when they'd first moved to the area. So many of them that they still left a bad taste in his mouth any time an adult so much as looked at him, let alone started in on him with that tone heavy in their voice. He could already feel the irritation sparking into something else, something darker, eyes shifting slowly to meet Melody's father's. Before he could even open his mouth, Melody was crashing out of the house, the screen door banging, and all but bowling her father over as she yelled Tommy's name. It didn't take much to chase her father back into the house, though the low tsking sound he made as he did so had Tommy's hands curling into fists.

“You're going to try and take on my papa in his own house? Seriously?” Melody bumped her shoulder into him, ignoring the dark look he sent her way as she moved to the door on the side of the garage. “There're rules against that kind of thing.”

“Yeah? So what.”

“Well you're in a bad mood... Your mom doesn't like Bon Jovi?”

“She does.” The answer was short, huffed out in the musky air as he forced the bike over the stunted step that led into the garage and barely resisted the urge to let the bike pedal scrape against the side of the car. “What's that got to do with anythin'?”

“I figured you were in a bad mood because she didn't like the tape or something.” Shoving a lawn mower out of the way, she looked at him over her shoulder. “I mean, I'd be kind of ticked if someone sent my mama a bum gift.”

Speechless, he stood there staring at her, let her take the bike from him to park it and then started laughing. Not soft chuckles that rolled straight from the throat, but deep down in the belly kind of laughs that sent him bending over to try and catch his breath. Even if the consequent interrogation had been almost too brutal to bear, the knowledge that Melody was going to die of embarrassment the moment he explained to her what she'd done made it worth it. Though he wouldn't admit to it, there was a hint of disappointment beneath the amused sound, a part of him that had been kind of thrilled that she liked him that much, like that. Liked him enough to write a stupid sappy song about him, the kind that meant that she cared for more than just the kid struggling to make ends meet, or keep his mother alive without real medicine. That she cared about just him.

“Wasn't bad as all that, tape has her wantin' you to come over and sing for her.”

“Really?”

He could see the wheels frantically whirling in her head, her head cocking to the side, spilling a thick mass of curls over her shoulder as she made sure the bike would stay where she leaned it. When her eyes met his, he smirked, letting her stew. It was a petty vengeance, especially considering she hadn't actually meant to put him through the most mortifying conversation with his mother since she sat him down for "the talk", but he was enjoying the way her lips were parting to start to ask before closing again as she stubbornly refused to give in. All of the humor rushed out of him in a single breath as he realized that he was at least partially enjoying watching her lips part just to stare at them.

“Yeah.”

“That's awesome!”

Tommy stumbled back to catch his footing, his ankle twisting slightly to send his back slamming against the passenger door of the car as Melody threw herself at him to hug tightly before stepping back and starting to ramble a mile a minute. He didn't catch half of it, pushing himself off the car and staring at her with a mixture of curiosity and blind panic.

“What do you think, Tommy? Do you think she'd like that?”

“Yeah.”

It didn't surprise him in the slightest that she didn't even notice the half choked response, practically glowing and grinning so broadly his cheeks ached in sympathy. Shaking off the unwelcome thoughts that had momentarily overcome him, he shoved his hands into his pockets and stalked out the door behind her. Was already half way down the block before she realized that he hadn't followed her into the house, and he could hear the sound of her running to catch up. What he should have prepared for was her leaping onto his back, her knees gripping the dip of his waist as her arms draped over his shoulders. But he hadn't, not hat he fell, but there was an unpleasant flutter in his stomach that had nothing to do with the questionable tomatoes that he'd put on his sandwich so his mother could have the good slices.

“Get off!” The words came out harsh, his hands cupping her knees and shoving them down as he shrugged her off. “Why you always got to jump on me, huh? Can't you just- Just stop doin' that, alright?”

“Yeah, alright you Grouch, I'll quit hanging on you.”

Despite the still playful tone, he could hear the hurt and confusion under it but he couldn't be bothered to soothe it. All he could think about were the questions his mother had fired at him with all the abandon of a boy with a slingshot and a full sack of stolen marbles. It was stupid, Tommy'd met the boys that Melody set her sights on, had listened to her gush about them, cry about them, sob onto his shoulder over them. He wasn't on the list. But now his mother had him thinking and he hated it.

“You gave me the wrong tape.” Instantly regretting blurting out the admission, he tugged on his shirt to straighten it before returning his hand to his pockets. “Think it was some kind of audition thing.”

“No.”

“Yeah, it's why mom wants you to come over.”

“No, it couldn't-” He tried to keep walking when she curled a hand around his elbow, but when she put both and dug in, it was stop or drag her along. “You didn't listen to it, did you?”

“I was busy makin' lunch, I put the tape on and walked out.”

That wasn't a complete lie, not exactly, but it was close enough to what she wanted to hear that he watched Melody literally sag with relief. He wasn't sure if he was amused by her reaction or not, but he suffered mixed feelings when she let her hands fall away. If there was one thing Tommy was always baffled by, it was her recovery time, watching the concern and beginnings of embarrassment fade away beneath another bright smile. What would she have done if he admitted that he'd not only listened to it once, but he hadn't even fought his mother on playing it two more times before falling asleep to the sound of her humming along with the guitar.

“If you did, it would have been fine.” Her eyes flicked towards his face, a flash of doubt passing through them before she wrapped her arms around his and laughed. “But since you didn't, you get the first performance live. Just you wait, Tommy. I'll have a ton of fans, and they'll make me a custom guitar to play at my gigs.”

“You ain't that good, Mel. I've been listenin' to you sing on the bus for almost a year now, bag of cats tossed in the bay sounds better than you.”

“Take that back!”

Easily ducking the slap she aimed for the back of his head, Tommy pulled loose and started running, teasing at first but in earnest once he realized that Melody was intent. Even after years of having it drilled into his head, he still looked back over his shoulder, just a quick look but it was enough to send him flying as a small ball rolled along the underside of his shoe. Panicking, he tried to catch his balance and considered himself lucky that his body lurched to the side to send him sprawling out in the grass. He found out he was mistaken in thinking that his fall would garner some kind of sympathy from her. The flat of her palms slammed into his shoulder blades as she landed on his lower back, soon followed by the sides of her fists as she beat the back of his head and down to his shoulders.

“You take that back Tommy Conlon, right now!”

“Jesus! Alright! I said, alright Mel! I give!” His knuckles were throbbing where she'd hit them, fingers unthreading from behind his head to look up at her. “What was that all ab-”

“You don't get to do that, Tommy.”

“I didn't do nothin'.”

“You don't get to tease me about things like that!” He ducked his head when it looked like she was going to hit him again, tongue tied by the sheen of tears in her eyes. “You're my best friend!”

Hands pressed against the grass, he started to slowly push himself up when he felt something wet hit the back of his neck. Feeling sick to his stomach, he let out a soft huff before squirming out from beneath her and turning to sit on the lawn. The sight of tears rolling down her cheeks made the sick twist in his stomach worse, deciding to let his head fall back and stare upwards at nothing instead. He hadn't meant for her to get upset, and now that he had he was a at a loss at how to fix it. Melody was always the one that was dancing on air, had a smile that blinded people at fifty paces, he hadn't even given credence to the thought that she might actually doubt herself.

“I'm sorry.”

“I think I scraped my knee, you- you jerk.”

“Well I ain't apologizin' for that, you're the one that tackled me while I was down. What'd you think was goin' to happen?” Cautiously, he rolled his eyes to look at her over his cheekbones and was relieved to see the beginnings of a smile twitching her lips, though she sniffled as she rubbed the back of her hand along her nose. “Maybe if you did somethin' besides singin', you'd know how to tackle somebody. What'd you do? Fling your whole body forward?”

“Yeah.” The weak chuckle made him grin, finally letting his chin fall as he supported his weight with one hand while the other massaged the back of his neck. “You were already down, I didn't think it mattered how I did it.”

“And you got a bum knee for it, don't you? Maybe I should show you how to attack someone so you don't get hurt.”

“I can protect myself!”

“Yeah, I saw that. You need help protectin' you from you, I think.” Tommy startled when she slid onto his lap, a soft sniffle reaching his ears as she rested her cheek on his shoulder. “And a lot of other guys if this is how you go around. Jesus Christ, Mel.”

“You really meant it when you said you were sorry, right?”

“Course I did.”

“You really think I can sing?”

“I don't know if I'd count what you been doin' on the bus as singin' but it's alright.” His eyes widened when her head popped off his shoulder, widening farther still when her lips brushed his cheek.

“You're really a jerk, Tommy. You were just supposed to say yes.”

“Just get off me and go home, okay? I've got to get back to my mom.” Cheeks burning, his hands pushed at her like her skin was fire, his palms barely touching before pulling back, head turning as he tried to hide the flush in them. “Why don't you go home and practice? You got a performance tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?”

“Yeah, she was thinkin' about gettin' all dolled up nice for you, don't tell me you ain't comin'.”

“And miss meeting your mom? You're kidding right?” Her arms were around his neck again, his nose buried in her hair as she kissed his ear. “I'll be there, guitar and everything.”

“Stop kissin' on me and get off my lap before the neighbors go callin' your dad and he tries skinnin' me or somethin'.” Laughing, she pushed off his lap and reached down to help him to his feet. “I sure hope all girls ain't like you. Don't think I'd be able to keep up with them mood swings...”

“You guys are Irish, right? You think I should ask the music teacher if he knows any Celtic songs?”

“God... Just sing whatever you want, I'm sure she won't care.”

“I'll ask then.” Hand lifting in the air, she showed him her fist, purposefully showing the thumb on the outside before punching him in the stomach lightly. “See you tomorrow!”

“Yeah, alright.”

Sleep took far longer than he cared to admit, even to himself, letting out a low groan as he buried his face into his pillow. Unsurprisingly, his mother and dragged him through yet another Spanish Inquisition, especially when his face went red when she started teasing him about their first kiss. He'd almost had to scream his good nights over the sound of her laughing, the sound for the first time in a long time not echoed by chest rattling coughs. What was a little embarrassment to that? And now he couldn't sleep because his stupid friend was messing with his head, all because she was a girl. Disgusted with himself, he dragged the blankets over his head and forced himself to fall asleep before his brain started taking his mother's supposed intuition to heart.


	3. Chapter 3

Some habits die hard, it takes ages for them to fade, forcing a repetitive action even though it's seeped in bad memories. This isn't to say that some habits aren't good, it's just when there are so many bad memories attached to it, it makes it a chore to continue. That's how Tommy felt as he jogged before the sun had even risen, hints of morning mist still sweeping over the grass. He could still hear the soft rumble of his father's car, see the way it crawled beside him out of the corner of his eye, and he hated it. He hated that even with a whole country between them he still woke up before the crack of dawn, humming that silly tune his father had sang up the stairs. Hated the way he pushed himself, just a little bit more because he could see the car edging ahead even though it wasn't there.

We're born fighters, Tommy. Our name means strength and speed, so don't you let up for nothin', you hear me? You pick up those feet boy! I don't want to hear about what other boys are doin', they're not goin' to get anywhere. Remember Theogenes, Tommy, you're goin' to make a new legend.

There were times he ran harder than he should, muscles and lungs burning, pushing himself to try and out run the memories that always seemed to be nipping at his heels. Trying to make himself forget the good times along with the bad, not wanting to recall the pride on his father's face after every win, any more than he wanted to remember the glossy eyes and red faced rage that he'd cowered away from. Today was not that day, nothing he could do would wash the memories away, not for lack of trying. An hour later he stumbled into the house and fell face first onto the couch, gathering the afghan that was draped over the arm of the couch to bury his face into.

He didn't remember falling asleep, but his elbow was still throbbing from where he'd jerked in surprise at the sudden knock on the door. Finding a bright eyed and bushy tailed Melody on his doorstep, her guitar held in one hand, a book tucked into the crook of the arm, was not something he was entirely happy about. All he wanted to do was sleep, and try to ignore the fact that he was still getting up every morning humming the stupid song he couldn't get to echo out of his head.

“Hey, Tommy!”

Melody didn't even seem to be deterred by the half cough, half grunt, he used to return the greeting. If anything she laughed, ignoring the baleful look he sent her as he lifted a hand to signal her to stay in the kitchen. There was a part of him that was feeling a bit like an idiot, kind of rude, but all of that disappeared as he knocked on the bedroom door and was met with his mother's smiling face. It wasn't that she hadn't been smiling, it was more the happiness that filled it. He hadn't seen a look like that on her face in far too long and it left him shell shocked.

For a moment he felt like he was six years old, sneaking out of bed to find his mom, hoping she'd make him something for breakfast. She'd worn the same smile then as she did now, slipping out of the bedroom and into the hall as she held her hand out for him to take. How she'd led them both towards the kitchen, hushing him with a finger to her lips every time a floor board had creaked, smiling at the exaggerated tip toeing they both did before breaking down and laughing in the kitchen as she started grabbing things for breakfast. He still thought she looked like an angel, even with illness ravaging her body, but back then with the sunlight just rising over the city skyline she'd glowed. At least until his father came into the kitchen, starting another day of training for Tommy.

“I'll be out in just a bit, I need to do something with this.” Lifting a pale thin hand to showcase her face, she closed the door and left him standing there dumbfounded.

The last time he'd even seen her out of her room, had been almost two months before, when the cancer that was making her sick had left her bed ridden. He'd tried talking her into going to the hospital, grasping at straws by trying to talk her into faking some kind of insurance but she'd given him that look and he'd quickly stopped talking and focused instead on not crying because tears did no good. A finger tapped his shoulder, making him jump because he'd been lost in his own thoughts, turning his attention to the inquisitive look that faced him.

“Mom'll be out in a sec.” Ushering her back towards the kitchen, he sent one last look towards the closed bedroom door. “You realize it's the weekend, yeah? Don't nobody even think of gettin' out of bed until one.”

“I'm always up at four thirty.” She laughed out right at his expression, misreading the scowl that curled his lips. “It's not that bad, means I get to go for a walk without having to worry about traffic or something.”

“You've certainly gotten prettier since the last time I saw you, Melody.”

Tommy felt his shoulders stiffen at the sound of his mother's soft voice, the rasp to it and the errant hitch to her breathing not able to cover the warmth in her tone. He almost didn't want to look at her, see the way the skin was translucent, the hollows of her cheeks and under her eyes were so glaringly obvious in the well lit room. Instead he focused on Melody's reaction, feeling a burst of warmth fill his chest when all his friend did was smile, the cheer genuine, lighting up her eyes as she shoved the book in his chest for him to hold.

“I'll never be able to catch up to you though, Mrs. Conlon.” 

The rest of the polite chatter passed right over his head, staring down at the book she'd foisted off on him to read the title. He barely managed to fight back a groan, the fancy font still easy to read, and declaring that it was a book full of Celtic ballads, God help him. Flicking through it he had to admit that the pictures that covered the pages, full of information regarding the story behind the songs, reminded him of the storybook that he found in the library before training and competing had taken over his life. There were still fuzzy memories of his father reading them, the low rough voice rumbling out of his father's chest as he sleepily clung to the shirt that smelled of the garage he worked in.

He wound up jumping when the sound of an acoustic guitar filled the small house, Melody's humming accompanying it. Scrubbing his face, he focused on the stack of dishes in the sink, moving with zombie like slowness as he turned on the water and started washing them. It wasn't that he didn't want to listen, it was the fact that even though his mother seemed to be doing better, he'd learned that most people with an illness had a final rally. If that's what this was he didn't want to think about it, didn't want to think about what that meant for either of them. 

“Tommy?” A hand cupped his elbow, trying to pull him away from the sink. “Tommy, you've been cleaning the same plate for about five minutes.”

“There's food stuck on it.”

Yanking his elbow loose, he felt his head snap towards the living room at the sound of his mother's coughing. When he found out it was her not so subtle way of getting him to join them in the living room he was less than amused, sitting on the couch and half glaring at her even as he scooted as far from Melody as he could. But even as he told himself that he wasn't going to enjoy the mini concert that was taking place, he felt his lips twitching, slowly curling into a smile as Melody's husky tone brought the song to life. He wasn't prepared for his mother to join in, her eyes closed as her raspy voice added a haunted quality to the ballad, listening to them both reach a harmony. Humming along softly, tunelessly, he didn't see the happy smile Melody sent his way, his eyes locked instead on the cars passing outside the window. 

She didn't stop singing even when it was clear that Tommy's mother had fallen asleep, her gentle snores barely heard over the song that had captured his attention. Didn't stop when her fingers had to be aching, because for the first time since she'd met him, Tommy looked relaxed. There was a certain way he held his shoulders, a curl to his mouth that matched the aggressive look in his eyes. All of that was gone, and she didn't mind that she'd probably wind up drinking pot after pot of tea, or the fact that her fingers would be sore for days, it was worth the half smile on his face as he continued to butcher the song without even realizing it was happening.

“She's asleep.”

This time it was Melody's turn to lift her head, the song trailing off as she placed her palm over the still vibrating strings. Following the jerk of Tommy's head, she smiled at the sleepy curl of his mother's lips. Carefully leaning her guitar against the couch, she slipped off of it and followed Tommy out the front door, blinking at the bright noonday sun even as the smile that blossomed into a broad grin.

“I don't know if her falling asleep is a good thing or not.” Her voice was hushed, even though Tommy had already closed the door to lean against the siding. “But her singing along was good, right?”

When he didn't respond right away, she felt her grin falter until she noticed his fingers tapping out the rhythm of the last song she played. Humming along softly she watched his lips curl into a slow smile, the one she'd seen earlier, and just as quickly watched him jerk as he realized what he was doing.

“She's just been tired, y'know? Though she's been lookin' better recently.” Scuffing the toe of his shoe on the porch, she watched the relaxed posture disappear, his hands forced into his pockets hard enough they dipped down as his fingers curled into fists. “Maybe that holy ointment, or whatever's, actually workin'.”

“Have you tried-”

“A doctor?” His voice snapped in the quiet afternoon, his chameleon eyes glaring at her. “You think if we could afford a doctor that I'd keep her at home like this? Drown the house in that nasty menthol shit so she can breathe easier? Mel are you even thinkin' right now?”

“I'm sorry, Tommy. I just-”

“Well don't.”

“What about your fath-”

“He's dead.”

Before he could elaborate on the lie that had easily spilled over his lips, his mother coughed herself awake, calling his and Melody's name and they ducked back inside. Tommy didn't smile like he had earlier, even when Melody started singing again. Instead he concentrated on cleaning the kitchen, his shoulders rounded as he started making a slap dash lunch which he delivered with no hint of cheer except for a tight smile as he handed the plate to his mother. Afterward he disappeared into his room, leaving the two females to talk and sing as much as they wanted, even when Melody went to say goodbye he didn't look up from the homework he was doing, his hand lifting with a flick of his wrist in farewell.

Tommy waited until his mother had gone to sleep for the evening before pulling out the jar from beneath his bed, staring at the jar full of wadded bills blank faced. Pulling out the month's rent, he crumpled them in his fist, even with the social security his mother got each month, there was never enough money to cover even a month's rest in the hospital. A month's rest that wouldn't save her so much as extend what little time she had left. A dull thunk echoed through the room, the thin paneling of the wall breaking beneath the impact of the jar.


	4. Chapter 4

Whatever improvement his mother exhibited was gone a month later, and despite how carefully he tried to conceal the fact, several members of the church that she'd frequented eventually found out. Even on his best days he wasn't the kind to listen to well wishes, or the constant stream of faith they were trying to pour into his ear, and the fact they were implying that he should admit her to the community hospital only upset him more. Ignoring the subtle way they were trying to edge their way into the house, he stood still and listened with a half ear as they continued to try and persuade him. The longer they talked, the tighter his fingers gripped the side of the door as he physically stopped them from setting foot in the house.

“Thomas, we're only trying to help.” The evil look Tommy sent the man caused him to pale, quickly swallowing even as he tried to stand straighter in hopes that even at five foot four inches he could get through to the dark tempered boy in front of him. “Mrs. Conlon, however brief she was, is still a member of our church and we take care of our own.”

“Well she ain't part of 'your own', she's my mom. And you can take your prayers and well intended wishes somewhere else, because they ain't helpin'.”

“It's not just for those the prayers are intended, there's a lift in spirit when you-”

The door slammed closed, a picture falling off the wall as he stared at the whorls in the wood. He could still hear them, their voices raised to try and continue the conversation he'd decisively cut off. For a moment he was worried that they'd wake her, the temptation to open the door and snarl enough obscenities that they left offended struck him so hard it stole his breath. What did they know? What could they possibly know about watching a mother wither slowly as cancer ate her alive?

Turning away in disgust, he threw himself onto the couch and stared at the page that held nothing more than his name and the date. The date which he'd had to change more times than he'd be willing to admit after marking it wrong again and again. Eyes flicking towards the open text book, he felt rage build in his chest before throwing it across the room, listening as the pages fluttered in soft rebuke. Staring at the awkwardly landed book, he tried swallowing the choking mixture of rage and depression building in his throat.

He hated feeling helpless, hated the fact that no matter what he did, there was actually nothing he could do. Hated the moments of weakness that led him to kneel by her bed, hands clasped, and pray to a god he wasn't even sure existed to just give him a little more time. There was a part of him that howled and raged, despaired against the inevitable in the way only the very young can do. Sure that if they screamed loud enough, let enough tears wash their cheeks, that even fate could be changed. But it was a very small part, one that was drowned out by the almost physical incarnation of his rage and hate that prowled around his heart.

Sleep was no longer even an acquaintance, instead Tommy slipped out in the middle of the night to do odd jobs that didn't pay half as well as he needed them to. He'd finally swallowed back enough bitter denial that he was able to admit that instead of saving up for a hospital, what he should be saving for was a coffin. But this morbid realization brought him no comfort, if anything a chill settled near his bones and he became even more closed off from the few interactions he had outside the house. Coming as close to terms with death as he was able, he still raged. Raged at his father for chasing them away, raged at God for threatening to take her away so soon and seemingly uncaring as to how that would leave a boy in a pseudo-man's body to struggle to adjust. Dragging himself to school every morning was one of the most difficult things he'd ever done. Not because the school work got harder, or because there were bullies that bothered him, but because all he could think about was the fact that he'd left his mother at home alone and she could die before he got out of school.

The only people that didn't lose patience with him, or give him up as a lost cause, were his gym teacher, the lunch ladies who still thought he was a charming boy even if he was more sullen than usual, and Melody. When he snapped at Melody, she blinked, once, twice, and then continued on like he hadn't spoken. Begrudgingly he accepted these rare moments of normalcy, ignoring the part of him that begged for just a few more minutes of what had been so soothing before he'd lost sight of the hope that his mother was somehow going to miraculously get better. It was like having a shock blanket, he knew that it existed but he couldn't fully appreciate it as well as he had before.

Now his hands always ached, and his knuckles were raw and throbbing. Nothing was too small a reason to start swinging, the bulk he'd built up by training to wrestle, and for something to give him some small measure of escape, was put to a more vengeful use. Where he'd had an occasional fight here and there, it became almost a daily ritual. Wake up bleary eyed, see that his mother was still asleep, leave a sandwich on her bedside table, go to school and pretend that any of that still mattered to him because it mattered to her. Even the teachers had wearily accepted it, the sound of someone crying out met with a dull sort of resignation as they sent Tommy and his adversary to the principal's office.

It didn't take long for his mother's failing health to become the center of school gossip, no one had really liked the anti social boy who didn't really fit in a set archetype. By size and gruff manner he could have been a bully, but he didn't stand for it. He could have been a loner, as he was now, but he was congenial enough when you spoke to him. Could even have set himself up as a jock but after a few medal worthy bouts he'd dropped wrestling. So to find out that his mother was apparently dying, and that his father was no where to be seen, they were pleased to finally be able to put him in a category. Charity case.

Not that Tommy noticed often, he was too lost in his own head for that, or even feel the hands that curled along his arms as girls tried to express their sympathies. The only girl he noticed was Melody and that's because she refused to be ignored. If he was seething at his homework, she perched on the desk in front of him and forced him to accept her help getting the answers. Even when he wanted nothing more than to be left alone, she didn't oblige him, instead she forced him to interact, sang silly songs at him until he gruffly told her exactly where she could go even though his lips curled slightly at the edges.

“Tommy?” Blinking at the blurred design of the couch cushions, his brow furrowed. “Jesus, Tommy. It looks like you let the homeless run rampant in here.”

“Go away, Mel.”

“C'mon, get up.” He huffed and jerked out of her grasp when she tried to pull him up. “Oh my God, what is that sm- Is that you?!”

“I mean it, go away.”

“Yeah? Okay, that's fair.”

He wasn't ready for the cool mist that landed on the back of his neck, or the sudden assault of rancid spring flowers that assaulted his nose. Tommy came up swinging, gagging on the air freshener that she'd sprayed him with, eyes narrowing at her as she stared back at him nonplussed. Before he could come up with a scathing remark that wasn't a low growl, she sprayed his chest and lower as she wrinkled her nose. Flickering between dumbfounded and furious, he jumped over the couch to chase her, hurdling over the steps that led into the backyard and slowly gaining. He didn't even really think about what he was doing, his fingers threading through her hair as he made a lunge in an attempt to grab a fistful of her sweater.

“You smell like a compost heap, Tommy. You need to shower.”

“No one fuckin' asked you, did they? I know I fuckin' didn't!” With a snarl he dove forward and tackled her to the ground just as she was turning her head to look over her shoulder at him. Glaring down at her, he wrestled the can out of her grip and threw it. “Leave me the hell alone, you hear me? Just leave me alone.”

“No!”

Part of him had been expecting that, even hoping for it, but all the rage that had been welling up inside him was choking that hopeful voice to little more than a squeak. Letting out a noise of disgust, he pushed himself off her and sent dirty looks to the curious faces that were peering through the window of the house whose yard they'd fallen onto. It took less than a second for the blind to fall, but Melody wasn't willing to give up as easily.

“You can't just lock yourself up in the house!”

“I don't, the door's unlocked.” He sneered at her, “Obviously since I got some crazy girl macin' me with air freshener.”

“You know what I m- Stop walking away from me or I'm going to beat the hell out of you!”

“Like to see you try.”

The air was knocked out of him when he hit the ground, the feel of her laying along his back and the wetness that soaked the collar of his shirt would have left him unable to talk anyway. He didn't want to feel anything other than the rage and self pity, and guilt, though not the particular flavor that she was making him feel like he was in the wrong. Flinching as her fists started pounding at his back, he squirmed trying to get out from beneath her, the ones managing to hit the back of his head sending waves of nausea through him before he finally managed to buck her off his back.

The wild right hook that caught him on the jaw surprised him, his fingers wrapping around her wrists and cuffing them as he straddled her body to hold her down. When her teeth sank into the side of his hand, he swallowed a yelp and stretched her arms above her head, staring down at her in disbelief as the mark throbbed. Ten minutes later she finally stopped throwing herself upwards in an attempt to break loose, her breath coming in soft pants.

“What the hell was that?” When she didn't answer, he cautiously started to let go only to have punch graze his throat. “Fuckin' stop it!”

“You stop it!” Surprised by the venom in her voice, he almost lost his hold on her when she started struggling again. “You think it's easy watching my best friend turn into some kind of zombie and not talk? I get your mom is sick but-”

“No! You don't get it! She's not sick, she's dying!”

Melody's eyes widened, her mouth falling open slightly as she tried to think of something, anything, that she could say and coming up blank. She'd had her suspicions, especially after the few visits she'd had with his mother and seeing the ghastly cast to her skin. His mother had even hinted at Tommy needing her friendship soon though she'd just assumed she was hinting at the dark moods that sometimes over came him. Hearing that his mother was dying made her feel foolish, she'd never had to deal with death, other than pets or seeing it on the news, and selfish, because all she wanted was her friend back and it felt like she was losing him with no idea how to win the uphill battle.

“What of?” Her voice was quiet, soothing, though it seemed only to make it worse, his fingers tightening around her wrists. “That bad?”

“It's cancer or somethin',” the words were hollow, his eyes even more so as he moved back to crouch on her thighs. Scrubbing his face with his hands, Tommy let out a humorless huff of laughter. “You know she still tries to tell me that God is goin' to make it better? That if she prays hard enough he'll be merciful or some shit. I can't believe that, it's-”

“It's all she has left Tommy, you can't just take that away from her.”

It wasn't until he'd moved off of her that either of them realized it was raining, his bulk had kept the worst of it off of her, and he was too lost to care that he was half soaked to the bone. He didn't even offer her a hand up, just stood and started walking back to the house, his eyes as unseeing as though he were blind. When he got to the house he couldn't seem to work the knob, his chilled fingers slipping off the metal until Tommy gave up and stared at it like it was a foreign object he'd never seen. The wind picked up, rain slashing against his side and back, but he couldn't seem to care. It had hurt so much more to say it out loud.

Arms wrapped around his middle, and he stared at them too, everything seemed foreign, wrong, out of place. The cheek that pressed against his back was warm, and while he craved it, he wanted to escape it in the same breath. He didn't want to feel warm anymore, but he couldn't make himself push the heat away, his fingers brushing over the bones in the wrist as he choked back a sob.

“She can't die. Mom's aren't supposed to die, they're supposed to nag you and take care of you and just-”

“It's okay, Tommy.”

“It's not okay!” He heard the pained whimper with a half ear, his hand gripping her wrist and throwing her against the door to glare. There was nothing okay about this, none of it. “Do you know she's got these pills? I get them from that asshole behind the school, and they're supposed to make it hurt less. Supposed to, but they don't. Not anymore. She asks for them and I have to keep uppin' the dose just to take off the edge, but I don't think they're even doing that!”

“What do you want me to do, Tommy? I'll help if you let me.”

“Yeah? What're you goin' to do? Sing her some pretty songs and maybe that'll be the cure that no one else found?” Scoffing, he sneered at her. “Maybe, if you sing about rainbows, and God reachin' down, he just might! Why don't you go ahead and fuckin' try that.”

“It might make her feel better! What's the harm in wanting to take her mind off the bad things with some good? You could do with a dose of something good, Tommy Conlon, all you're thinking about is what could go wrong.”

“Are you fuckin' kidding me? What, I'm supposed to forget my mom is dyin' and try out for football? Study real hard so I can get into a good school after I graduate? None of that fuckin' matters.”

“I dare you to tell your mom that.” She hissed, fighting the urge to try pressing herself through the door to escape the malicious look he shot her. “I bet she'd read you your rights and send you back to school.”

“If she'd even wake up.”

“She- Oh God, Tommy, I-”

“Don't you dare fuckin' say you're sorry... I don't want to hear that from you, you're the only one who don't treat me like some kind of thing to be pitied.” Angrily brushing the tears and rain from his cheeks, he took a shaky breath. “You're a real bitch sometimes, actually. I don't think you understand leavin' a person alone when they don't want to talk to nobody.”

“I was going to say 'I'm sure she will.' but at the moment I want to slap you for calling me a bitch. How dare you!” Lips curling into a tentative smile, she lightly shoved at his chest before her air rushed out from her lungs as he wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her shoulder. “You can't call me a bitch and then cuddle me, Tommy. It doesn't work like that.”

“I'm just so angry all the time and confused and just-” The words were muffled and cut off with a sniffle. “It shouldn't be her, she's a good person!”

“She's very sweet.”

“You know she used to sneak me sweets when Pops would get drunk and start yellin' at me for not trainin' hard enough?” A watery laugh accompanied the words. “She'd buy a big bag and hide it where he wouldn't look for it and then give a piece to me and Brendan.”

“Brendan's your brother?”

“He was, he was my big brother.” Tommy shrugged his shoulders and slowly pulled back far enough to meet Melody's eyes. “I just got my mom, and she's dyin'. How is that fair?”

“That's not true, Tommy, it's not. You've got me.” She grinned, brushing at the rivulets of water that were slowly running down from his hair. “Me and my pretty songs about rainbows.”

“You start singin' and I'm goin' to shut you up so fast your head will spin.” He snorted at her disbelieving look. “I mean it, don't you dare start singin' some bullshit song about rainbows.”

“Somewhere, over the rainbo-”

He was right, her head did spin, his fingers gripping her jaw to close her mouth as he pressed his lips against hers. Her hands that had been resting on his collarbone slid over the curve of his traps to wrap her arms around his neck, pulling him close to her. It wasn't a gentle kiss, his fingers slowly loosening their grip to smooth his palm down her body to grip her hip, the press of lips half desperate before finally pulling back for air.

“I told you.” Tommy aimed for smug, but his voice shook and he couldn't stop himself from sliding his tongue over his lips to taste her and the rain that slicked them. He watched the shocked expression on her face turn to bemusement, and then watched as a familiar gleam of mischief entered her eye.

“You remember that movie Mr. Gallst had us watch, cause he was hungover and he didn't want to deal with a ton of questions?”

“Wh- No? What are you talkin' about?”

“He made us watch that stupid muppet movie, and you were teasing me for singing along with Kermit the Frog?”

“I don't see what that has to-”

He stared at her suspiciously when she started humming, then burst out laughing when he realized what she was doing. The laughter had a hysterical edge to it, and he kissed her again, chasing the funny sensation it caused in his chest that made it easier to breath and harder at the same time.


	5. Chapter 5

He hadn't expected his mother to be awake when he made it back into the house, the saturated fabric of his shirt, still tangled around his ears, muffling the sound of her calling his name. Licking his lips nervously, he toyed with his shirt before throwing it towards the washer as he walked into her room. For a split second he actually thought he'd get away with not having to talk about the dazed expression he knew was on his face, but the fact that he coated his lower lip with the ointment that he'd just smeared on her sternum because he was thinking about kissing Melody, dashed all of that. 

“I hope kissing Melody tasted better than that.” She rasped teasingly, watching as he desperately pawed at his mouth trying to clear it, half coughing half laughing as he stared at her dumbfounded. “Did you really think I wouldn't notice? I'm dying not dead.”

The tease made his hand still, his eyes filling with tears before he dropped his head and forced them back. Thin fingers played with his damp hair, trailing over his cheek as he lifted his head to stare at her pleadingly. There was a heavy silence in the air now, the light teasing manner gone as the chill of death filled the room again. Chin lifting as her cool fingers pressed against it, he found it hard to breathe, his eyes almost impossibly wide as he fought against gravity's pull of the tears in his eyes, and the rising fear of the inevitable time of walking into the room to find his mother no longer breathing.

“Hush, Tommy boy, I've got a while yet.” Soothing tone or not, his body jerked forward before going still again, desperately wanting to throw himself onto her lap as he'd done when he was very small. His mother smiled and struggled to lever herself up, the exertion causing her to cough even as she clutched at the white under tee he wore. “I've a while yet, so come here and tell me about how you finally got to kiss the lovely Melody, eh? I'd like to hear about that.”

He didn't fight her when her hand tugged insistently on his shirt, curling up beside her and ignoring the heavy medicinal smell in the air as he rested his cheek on the concave line of her stomach. It took a supreme effort not to start sobbing at the rattling breath he could hear in her chest, and the light as breeze stroke of her fingers through his hair. Mouth opening and closing twice, he gruffly wiped the tears from his eye and took a breath to steady himself.

“It was alright.” Tommy finally muttered, his throat strangling the laugh that tried to rise out of it when her fingers slapped the side of his head softly. “Okay, okay, it was really somethin' else? I don't know. You remember when that Tiffany girl kissed me? After that first match I won 'cause she saw it in some stupid movie her mom was watchin'? It was better than that.”

“I would hope so, you were only eight...”

“I know, Mom!” His head lifted to glare at her, a reluctant smile spreading his lips when he noticed the teasing cast to her own. “I'm just sayin' it was loads better than that, but I don't think it'll be happenin' again.”

“Wha-” the exclamation sent her into a coughing fit, Tommy all but falling off the side of the bed to grab a cloth for the bloody sputum that was inevitable. What surprised him was the angry look in her eyes as she glared at him even as she struggled to stop the fit.

“What're you glarin' at me for?!”

“Thomas Michael Conlon, if you're trying to tell me-” she cut off with another coughing fit, though her eyes remained locked on his. “You've liked Melody since you started school here! Don't yo- Don't you dare waste a chance to be happy because of-”

“It ain't right!” Temper flaring, he glared back at her even as the thick wet sound of her coughing echoed through the room. “I can't deal with likin' some girl, workin' at night and goin' to school, and... This!”

“Lower your voice.”

Hushed as her words were from a raw throat, they caused his mouth to snap closed, eyes mutinously dropping to the floor. She couldn't actually expect him to deal with another emotional burden, as soothing as Melody's company could be, there wasn't enough of him to give over to romantic dreams and stolen kisses. Tommy considered himself lucky that he was able to do his school work and pass his classes with a B average. Unbidden, the dazed look in Melody's eyes flashed across his mind's eye, the way her lips had curled into a smile during the second press of lips that had been much better than the first. Movement out of the corner of his eye had his head lifting, his eyes widening in disbelief as the hint of a smile fell away.

“What the fuck are you doin'?”

“Say that again and I'll pop you.” Her body folded in half as she fought another coughing fit, fingers gripping the edge of the bed. “You watch your tongue, Thomas Michael, you know better.”

“You shouldn't be gettin' out of bed, what do you got to do that's so important?”

“I'm going to talk to Melody.”

“Are you fuckin' crazy?” His voice cracked, eyes going wide when her palm connected with his cheek. Blinking slowly, the shock taking its sweet time to pass, he stared at her as the sharp pain radiated through his cheek. 

“If you think I'm going to lay here, and let you put your life on hold because I'm ill, you've got another thing coming.” Ignoring the sullen glare he sent her, she cupped his face in her hands and kissed the red mark on his cheek. Her lips brushed the spot again before she tilted his head and rested her lips against Tommy's forehead. “You can't just put your life on hold, Tommy. That's not how this works, I was going to die before you anyways, it's just a bit earlier than either of us would have wanted.”

“I can't just-”

“You can, I want you to be happy. You're not going to be happy cooped up in this house with me all the time.” His arms hesitantly wrapped her waist as she looped hers around his shoulders, her hand lightly cupping the back of his head and stroking the hair and nape. “You were such a sweet boy and I am so sorry about all the things you were dragged through.”

“Wasn't your fault.” He mumbled, enjoying the sweet scent of vanilla that he could just catch beneath the medicinal smell that almost drowned it out. “Pops was-”

“Don't, it wasn't all his fault.”

“It was! If he hadn't-”

“I said don't. Please.”

Lips thinning, he squeezed tighter, swallowing the angry words back and concentrated on not letting them spill out. Even after all that his father had but them through, she refused to let Tommy bad mouth him. Breaking loose of the hug, he tried to leave the room, making a half hearted attempt to pull free when she grabbed a fistful of his shirt. He didn't want to not talk about it, he wanted to rage and scream, wanted to throw fit, but the best he could do was clench his jaw and shove it down until he felt like he couldn't feel anything at all. Turning to smile at her, he muttered an apology knowing that it wasn't half as believable as it should have been but it was enough.

“I'm goin' for a walk or somethin'. You'll be alright while I'm out, right?”

“Of course,” He could hear the hurt in her voice, and it just made him feel tired.

Sending her another tight lipped smile, he kissed her cheek and walked to his room to grab the gray hoodie he'd gotten from his mother at Christmas. Not last Christmas but several before it, the sleeves dangling well past his fingers, the hem brushing below his knees. He'd slept in it on nights he couldn't seem to get warm, remembering the way the whole family had laughed when he'd stared at her in disbelief as he swung the too long sleeves. It was one of the few memories he had that still glowed around the edges, that wasn't tarnished by hatred and disillusionment.

A low sound of annoyance rolled out of him at the sight of rain pounding on the window, it was always raining, never seemed to stop. Shoving his hands into the the pocket on the front of the hoodie, he walked out of his room, quickening his steps to try and avoid another talk with his mother he opened the door and was half off the porch when he saw Melody coming up the walk. She stopped when he did, smiling as she pushed the wet bangs from her forehead, shrugging her shoulders at the questioning look he sent her. 

“You want to hang out or something? It'll get you out of the house and,” she trailed off, the smile on her lips uncertain, fingers toying with a wet curl. “I don't know, I don't want to seem like I'm pushing or anything, because I'm not. I just- Well you stay cooped up in the house all the time, and I'm not saying we're dating just because we kissed, that'd be stupid.”

Whatever else she was going to add was cut off, the ramble had picked up speed as he'd walked down the steps, but he cut it off entirely as his hand cupped her jaw and he kissed her. It was better than the first because she melted into it, her hand gripping the fabric of his hoodie, pushing up on her toes with a low sound in her throat. His lips curled slowly when her other hand lifted to wrap around his shoulders, his hand settling on her hip as he pulled her closer.

“So, does this mean we're dating or-” another soft sound escaped her when he kissed her again, flicking the tip of his tongue against her lower lip curiously.

“I don't know, but I like this.” Shoulders rolling in a shrug, the smile was slow in coming, but when it finally bloomed it was crooked. “And I like you, and maybe even those stupid songs about rainbows.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, a bit.”

“So if I started singing some 'stupid song about rainbows',” hand sliding up his chest, she grinned up at him as her eyes flicked down to his mouth before staring up at him through wet lashes. “Are you going to listen, or kiss me again?”

“Try it and see.”

“... I can't think of one.”

“You serious?” Laughing, he wiped the rain from his face, flicking the water from his fingertips into hers. “I think that's a first, ain't it? You always have some kind of song playin' in your head, don't you?”

“Well, I'm a bit distracted.”

“Cause it's rainin', right?” He tugged on her curls and tried not to smirk.

“Tommy Conlon, are you fishing for a compliment on your kissing?”

“Maybe.”

“Keep fishing, then.” Melody teased, tilting her head back in clear invitation.

“Might have to.” Brushing his lips over hers, he struggled not to laugh outright. “Think Jessica might like my kissin', maybe I should find out.”

“Oh?”

“Yup, think I might just-” He trailed off when she lifted an eyebrow, the words dying on his tongue. “You were just supposed to tell me I was kissin' you right. Would that really have been that hard?”

“Might have been.”

“Seriously? I thought girlfriends were supposed to be nice and stuff.”

“So we are dating.” Stammering, his hands fell and he shoved them into his pockets, leaving her grinning up at him with her arms still looped around his neck. “Say it.”

“Yeah, okay? Yeah, we're-”

“We're...”

“Girl's aren't supposed to be mean, that's what boys are for.”

“We're...”

“Jesus fuckin' Christ!” 

“Say it, Tommy. C'mon.” Pecking the side of his mouth, she pulled away when he turned his head to try and catch her lips with his. “It's a girl thing, just say it once and I won't make you say it again.”

“I suppose we're dating.” He huffed when her smile broadened, stumbled back when she jumped up and Tommy caught her as he stared at her incredulously. “That can't have made you that happy.”

“Say it again.”

“You just said-”

“I lied, it's a girl thing.”


	6. Chapter 6

“I'm not carryin' your books, alright? And I ain't goin' to open every door you have to walk through.” Sniffing lightly, he toyed with the fries on his tray, his brow furrowing as he tried to think of other sappy things he'd seen boys doing when they were dating someone. “Oh! And you ain't goin' to be decoratin' all my stuff with any stupid stickers or those hearts with our initials in it. That's just... It's weird.” 

“Uh huh.” She drawled, rolling her eyes as she propped her elbows on the table and tucked her chin onto her threaded fingers. “Well, you're not going to be slapping my butt or expecting me not to wear your jacket whenever I feel like it.” 

“You can't have my jacket, that ain't happenin'.” 

“Will.” Melody reached out and snagged a fry, slowly nibbling on it. “And you'll carry my books because it makes you look like a gentleman.” 

“No stealing my food! You're a girl, make your own or somethin'.” 

“That was sexist.” Stealing another one, she purposefully held it in front of her open mouth before decisively biting down on it. “I want the jacket, Tommy, just like once a week or something.” 

“You got your own clothes though!” 

They half heartedly bickered the rest of the way through lunch, uncaring of the eyes that were flicking in their direction as they continued negotiations. One of the boys at a neighboring table laughed outright when Melody pinched the fry out of Tommy's hand after he set his tray on the seat next to him, the merry sound choking off when Tommy sent a scowl his way. It wasn't until they were dumping the tray into its receptacle that someone started actively taunting, Melody's hands wrapping around Tommy's closed hand, leaning close to whisper in his ear. That didn't stop him from pulling loose and stalking towards the boy whose smile disappeared to purse as he made kissing noises in Tommy and Melody's direction. 

Bodies moved to surround them, creating a barrier against the inevitable authoritative figure who would be coming to stop the fight, pushing the boy back towards Tommy after a brusque shove sent him stumbling back. It wasn't a fair fight, though the boy out weighed Tommy by a good twenty pounds, the rage that simmered just beneath the surface fueled his punches, years of conditioning guided them. With mob-like mentality, the other children cheered when the bigger boy was left kneeling on the floor, spitting blood out of his mouth as Melody dragged Tommy away. 

“How did this happen?” Tommy leaned against the lockers situated in the hallway, staring down at the books in his arms that weren't his. “Didn't I say I wasn't doin' this sissy shit?” 

“You also said the reason I couldn't have your fries was because I'm a girl and I obviously knew how to make my own lunch. It's a bid for forgiveness.” Her voice was tinny, echoing out of the locker as she shifted things around to make room. “Or it could be the fact that I saved you from another visit to the principal's office. You remember that?” 

“Bit murky on that bit, I don't see how that quite adds up.” 

“You've got to stop fighting everyone who looks at you sideways, okay?” She tossed a notebook on top of the pile in his arms, grabbing her hair brush and giving her hair a once over before slamming the locker door shut. Sorting through the stack in his arms, she took her books and leveled him with an exasperated look. “Do you even remember what he said? Were you listening or did you just leap on the chance to beat on him.” 

“Since the third option's likely to get me smacked, I don't think I got nothin' to add.” 

The crooked grin he sent her slowly wilted, forced to shoulder his way through the hallway crush to catch up to her after she huffed at him and slipped through with far more grace. Tugging the books she was carrying out of her arms and adding them to his own, he sighed when she didn't even bother glancing at him. Steps slowed to match hers, he followed her to their only shared class, kicking the kid who sat behind her from their seat. 

“How long you think you're goin' to give me the silent treatment?” he whispered to her as she collected the books she'd need from the stack, his fingers tapping the desk when she turned without a word. “C'mon Mel, you can't be doin' this when we've only been goin' out for a few weeks!” 

“Mr. Conlon! Class is starting, quiet.” 

“Yeah? That's nice.” Moodily sitting back, he slumped down in his seat and pulled his book open as he glared at the back of Melody's head. 

Digging around in his pocket for a pencil, he let out a soft groan of frustration when he noticed that it had broken. A quick attempt at trying to hold it together and write with it at the same time proved fruitless, the top half tumbling from his pinched grip to roll to the floor. Hushed curses rushing from between clenched teeth, he lightly kicked a leg of Melody's chair to get her attention, kicking the seat when she ignored him. Staring at her incredulously when even that didn't garner a reaction, he tugged on a hank of hair hard enough her head jerked but still didn't turn around. 

“Are you fuckin' kiddin' me? Melody!” Tommy hissed, gripping the front of his desk to pull his torso across it. “Can I just get a pencil?” 

He jerked back when he saw her move, half expecting her to turn and hit him, instead he was forced to try and catch the pencil she tossed over her shoulder. Fumbling, it hit his shoulder after bouncing off his palm, landing somewhere behind him on the counter that ran along the wall. Eyes locked on the board, ignoring the narrow look the teacher sent him, he feigned being incredibly interested in the notes sprawled out in the teacher's crabbed handwriting. He waited until they turned back around before leaning across the aisle and motioning towards one of the pencils on his neighbor's desk. 

Class took longer than usual, the minutes seeming to multiply upward to hours as the teacher droned on and on. Half assed notes covered less than a quarter of the page before Tommy ripped off a section and wrote a quick apology, watching the teacher as he folded it, tossing it over Melody's shoulder in a hurried delivery. He watched it fall to the floor, her hand flicking it off her thigh as she continued to take notes. Muttering obscenities beneath his breath he wrote another, this time adding a smiley face to the cover before leaning forward and carefully putting it on her shoulder, his back straining as he stayed stretched to keep her from depositing it to the floor as well. 

 _Apology not accepted, just take your licks._  

 _I didnt do nothin wrong!_  

Watching her take the note and read it, he blinked slowly when she refolded it and tucked it beneath her book. Eraser flicking at her hair, he scowled when she twisted it before moving it to lay on her shoulder. A soft snicker came from the girl next to him, though her attention was focused on the teacher when he snapped his head to the side to glare. It had to be a conspiracy or something like it, he finally decided, noticing a couple of the other girls in class were obviously amused as well, one going so far as to lay her head on her arms as she shook from silent laughter. 

 _Mel, cmon talk 2 me_  

 _We're in class Tommy it can wait_  

 _just tell me ????_  

 _No._  

Staring at the very obvious punctuation that followed the denial, he let his head fall back as he tried to swallow the growl building in his chest. Kissing was nice, cuddling definitely because sometimes that lead to a bit of grinding, but whatever the hell this was could take a flying leap as far as he was concerned. Book closing with a not so subtle thump, he crossed his arms over his midriff and settled low in his seat, his gaze locked on the back of her head. For a moment he thought about tearing up little strips of paper, chewing on them, and flicking them into her hair. The briefest of moments, swiftly set aside at the thought of having to deal with the surprisingly terrifying way she could speak, soft as kitten fur but there was a chill to it that sent shiver racing along his spine. 

He jumped when a piece of paper slid across his desk from the wrong direction, staring at it warily before opening it once he was sure the teacher wouldn't notice. 

 _Wut did u do_  

Shrugging helplessly at the boy who'd tossed the note onto his desk, he refolded the paper and hid it beneath his palm, catching the second one as it slid over the desk's surface. 

 _Shes got a evil smile or somethin_  

Eyes narrowing, he read the note twice before meeting the other boy's eyes to confirm what he'd read. A rush of dread flooded through him. He'd seen the smile the boy seemed to be talking about, Melody had worn it once when they had been doing homework in his room and he refused to keep his hands to himself. It was silent treatment, that smile, and then she did something mean, even if that meant he didn't quite catch on right away. Like telling his mother that he was handsy and apparently adding on that he didn't seem to have gotten “the talk”. He'd rather face a firing squad considering the over abundance of possibilities in the school for her to use as ammunition. 

“Mel?” Voice a low whisper, he lightly played the tips of his fingers along her back, flicking his attention towards the teacher who seemed to be engrossed in helping another student. “Hey, babe?”

“Mr. Conlon...” 

“I'm just tryin' to get a pencil, the lead's all busted in mine.” 

“Uh huh. Just keep your hands to yourself, and concentrate on your work.” 

Death or homework, Tommy hadn't ever thought that homework would win that toss up, squirming in his seat in an attempt to have more room to lean forward. Fingers curling around the top of Melody's chair, he pulled his body forward and pressed an awkward kiss to her shoulder. 

“I'm sorry I broke his nose, okay? That's it, isn't it? No more fights this week, I promise.” 

“Mr. Conlon!” 

“I need a fuckin' pencil, alright? Jesus...” 

Silently accepting another pencil from the same boy as before, he hunched over his desk and got through two questions before his eyes rolled up to stare at Melody. Nothing else had come to mind, so he was relatively sure he just needed to work this angle to avoid the girl's devious payback. Unfortunately he wasn't entirely sure what else he could do, the eraser end tapping on the desk as he tried to think. His drawing skills weren't any where near the level he figured they'd need to be to try using a cute picture, and there was no way he was going to drop the l-o-v-e word or some stupid heart on something so small. No, that he was saving for something serious, like getting her to give him the answers to the biology test she had two classes before him, that would be worth it if it got him a quick cheat sheet. 

A crumpled piece of paper flew over her shoulder, almost hitting him in the face, causing him to sit up with a jerk that made his chair's legs screech. Hand slamming down on the note, he met the teacher's annoyed look with a wide eyed innocent look of his own until they sighed and turned their attention back to the student who had asked for their attention. 

 _Does your mom still want me over for dinner tomorrow?_  

Fingers tapping the note, he glared at her before writing a response. 

 _mayb... u gonna do somethin evil?_  

 _Maybe :)_  

 _that aint funny_  

 _I'm not joking_  

 _I said sorry !_  

 _Wrong thing._  

“Wrong thi-” Crumpling the paper, he went to tuck it into his pocket only to have it snatched from his hand. 

“Dinner plans can be discussed after class.” They drawled after skimming over the note, recrumpling it and tossing it into the trash. 

Fuming, Tommy mockingly mouthed the words before once more settling low in his seat and glaring at the back of Melody's head. He couldn't think of anything else, not off the top of his head, and even after considerable thought the best he could come up with was the fact he'd said something 'sexist'. 

 _Girlz rule boyz drool_  

 _Not even close._  

Back to cursing beneath his breath, he ruffled his hair as he stared at the paper like it would somehow magically spell out what he'd done to piss her off. In a sudden flash of inspiration, he came to the conclusion that maybe he hadn't done a thing, this was all some sort of twisted head game girls liked to do. Seemed a bit far fetched, but then again there was no understanding girls. The bell ringing broke him out of his musings, restacking his books and purposefully avoiding the path Melody took, even though it meant having to rush to get to class on time. When he met her after school to get on the bus, he half expected her to st elsewhere, but she grabbed the hem of his shirt when he made a move to walk past where she'd sat. 

“Am I actually in trouble, or are you just fuckin' with me?” Slipping an arm around her shoulder, he buried his nose in her hair, nuzzling playfully. Tommy barely managed to keep the smile on his face when she deftly moved from beneath his arm. 

“Trouble.” 

“Really? Well fuck...”


	7. Chapter 7

Where dinner had been whatever Tommy could scrape together, set on plates, and eaten in his mother's room in silence, now they were different. Now it was almost a dinner party, Tommy and Melody perched at the end of his mother's bed, knees touching, conversation a pleasant hum in the air. Even the dim light seemed brighter, smiles and laughter filling the room. There was a small part of him that begrudged Melody this, disliked the disruption of what had been his sanctuary, but then she'd smile at something he said, or make his mother laugh, and the feeling dissipated like smoke. Even the food was better, though not through any marked improvement of Tommy's cooking, her parents occasionally sent over a meal for them to share.

At first it had sent Tommy into a rage, hoarsely whispering to Melody as she stood on the front porch with the tupperware in hand, stomach twisting at the courteous gesture. He didn't want hand outs, hated the very notion so much his body shivered with it. But Melody won out, his mother an unsurprising ally, making the compromise that Tommy would do some kind of yard work to pay for the fancier cooking. Half the time he wasn't even sure what he was putting on his fork, his attention caught by the happier look on his mother's face, the way Melody would tickle the arch of his foot when she wanted him to hand her something. He even found a small clinic that would let him do payments, obtaining mediocre but welcome health care that had his mother looking better than she had in months.

“Thomas!”

Head jerking up, his spoon going still, he smiled at his mother until he realized that his name hadn't just been a bid for his attention but that he was actually in trouble. Tossing Melody a sour look, he resolutely shoved a bite of whatever was on his plate into his mouth as he waited. Part of him was glad that he was finally going to find out what he'd done to piss Melody off, the rest of him was sullenly accepting that there really had been no avoiding this.

“Well?” He drawled after they were both quiet, shoving another bite into his mouth and working on it until he could talk around it. “What's the lecture?”

“Do you even know what that boy said to you?”

Thrown off balance, realizing he'd missed the lecture and jumped right to the end where his mother started reading him his last rights, he went back to eating, gaze dropping to his plate as he shrugged his shoulders.

“Nope.”

“And you just started swinging anyways? Are you trying to get expelled?” When he shrugged again his mother threw a small pillow at him, Tommy exclaiming when it almost landed in his dinner. “Melody's already told me you don't plan on going to college, is this your way of making sure you can't change your mind later?”

“No.” Glaring daggers at Melody, he started grouping what was left to one side of his plate. “I just didn't like him talkin' sh- I could tell he was bein' rude.”

“But you don't know what it was.”

“It don't matter! He shouldn't of opened his fat mouth and started talkin' 'bout Mel, I bet he don't even know her.” The soft snort he heard from his left, made him angrier. “And if he does know her, then he knows he shouldn't be sayin' nothin' bad 'bout her!”

“You didn't have to break his nose because of it.”

“I should have broken his jaw...”

Whatever else his mother said was lost as his head filled with static, his hand aching where it clenched around the spoon's handle, nodding occasionally before abruptly moving off the bed and slamming the door behind him as he left. He didn't have a destination in mind, tossing his plate into the sink, listening to the spoon rattle around the sink before settling half tucked beneath the plate's rim. The inspired idea of hiding out on the roof was quickly dashed, as was barricading himself in his room, his feet carrying him out the backdoor and to the small shed in the back yard.

His shoulders were aching by the time Melody found him, his fists repeatedly slamming into the multicoloured heavy bag he'd rescued from the curb, head throbbing from his temper and how tightly he was clenching his teeth. Ignoring the hushed inquiry she made of his name, he continued to swing, varying the angle of each. It grew harder and harder to concentrate when she started humming, items falling off the shelf as she made room to hop up, her legs swinging slowly.

“Can you stop that?” Tommy finally snarled, glaring at her out of the corner of his eye. “It's fuckin' irritatin'.”

“Which part?” Lifting a hand from the shelf she slowly ticked them off. “Is it the legs swinging, the staring, the silent prodding or-”

“You're not silently anythin', you're hummin'.”

“So it's my humming? I thought you liked my humming, and my singing.” He watched as she hopped off the shelf, going stiff when she wrapped her arms around his middle from behind as her cheek rested between his shoulder blades. “It's a song that makes me think about you.”

Tommy almost asked, his mouth opening before snapping shut, hands shoving at her arms to pull loose and create some distance. Curling and uncurling his hands into fists, he stared down at his reddened knuckles as he put the heavy bag between them. Melody was humming again, leaning around the bag as she smiled at him.

“My friend Tabitha came over to spend the night and she brought this movie,” circling the bag, she trailed her hand along it as she followed Tommy, chuckling when he continued to keep the distance by moving too. “I don't think you'd watch it, but I liked it, the songs were awesome.”

“Fine. What movie was it?”

“Footloose.”

“What kind of name is that for a movie? That sounds stupid.” In spite of himself, he felt himself getting curious, his lips twitching as she leaned on the bag to smile at him around it. He didn't want to smile, he was still annoyed that the two of them had ganged up on him, that his mother had taken someone else's side. “I bet it was stupid.”

“No, it was really good! It was about these teens who lived in a town where dancing was against the law because of some car accident or something.”

“Yeah, like I said stupid.”

“You liked Dirty Dancing.” She reminded him, rolling her eyes at the look of disgust on his face. “I know you did! I wasn't the one who rewound the tape and restarted it.”

“I thought it was somethin' else when we were watchin' it so I had to watch it again to even pay attention.” That was a lie, but he hadn't enjoyed the movie, he'd enjoyed having Melody curled up next to him in the couch, and listening to her hum along with the songs she'd liked. The movie itself could fall into a pit and never come back if it hadn't been for that. “It's called Dirty Dancin', you'd think there'd have been... You know, somethin' dirty.”

“Uh huh.”

“If you were a guy, and your girl said somethin' like that you'd think that's what it meant too!”

“So what did you think Footloose was about?” She'd moved from behind the bag now, her arms loosely crossed over stomach, eyebrow arched as she stared at him. “I'm dying to know.”

“I don't know, just thought it sounded stupid, and after what you told me I'm pretty sure it is.” Tommy's eyes narrowed at her when she started to smirk, his head shaking slowly. “One girly movie a lifetime, Mel, I ain't watchin' Footloose. There ain't nothin' you can do that'll change my mind.”

“I'm sure there are a few things.”

He almost fell taking a hasty step back, forcing himself to stand still as she moved closer, her hands resting on his chest as she stared up at him through her lashes. Pulse racing, Tommy skimmed his tongue over his lips and tried to remember what was at stake. Dirty Dancing had been alright, but Footloose was a step too far, several steps too far. Almost jumping out of his skin when her hands started sliding downwards, he stared at her with a mixture of anxiety and anticipation. Melody's lips were soft on his, her fingers wrapping around the waistband of his sweats, and he was pretty sure his heart was going to stop.

“I'll give you the answers to the next three tests in Mrs. Blair's class.” 

The whispered words didn't translate at first, every ounce of his focus locked on just where the band of his sweatpants were situated, half wanting her to dip inside, half terrified at the thought.

“Wait. What?” Grabbing her wrists, he pulled her hands away and stared at her confused as his mind frantically tried to catch up. “Tests?”

“Well you suck at Biology, so if you watch Footloose with me-”

“Tests.”

“I'll give you the answers to the next three of them.” She finished like he hadn't just repeated himself again, kissing him again and swallowing the laughter in her throat when he belatedly moved to kiss her back. “What'd you think I meant?”

“Well you had your fingers in my fuckin' pants, what do you think I was thinkin'?” Flustered, he glared at her, letting out a soft noise of disgust. “You can't just do that to a guy, it's mean. Jesus... I thought you meant-”

Tommy trailed off at the amused look on her face, his brow furrowing before clearing as he took a step forward to crowd into her space, pleased to watch the amused look fade away into one of apprehension. It was only fair he returned the favor, smiling when she took a step back to mirror the next he took forward. His hands wrapped around her waist, lifting her to sit on the shelf once they reached it, his hands cupping her calves and slowly pulling her legs apart to settle her knees on his hips.

“Tommy?”

Instead of answering, he slowly slid his hands upwards, his thumbs kneading, leaning forward to stop just shy of kissing her as he held her gaze with his. Curling his hands around her hips, he dragged her forward, his eyes flicking down to her mouth as she leaned away from him, her breathing irregular as she stared at him like a deer caught in the headlights. Fingers moving upwards to dip beneath her sweater, he stroked the skin with his thumbs, closing the distance to kiss her, teeth closing on her lower lip to play with it. He pulled back when her arms moved to drape over his shoulders, grinning when she pulled herself closer to him as her eyes fell shut. Melody's fingers tangled in his shirt when he didn't deepen the kiss again, a frustrated whine escaping her when Tommy kept it to soft brushes.

“What was the song?”

“Hmm?”

“The one you said made you think of me.” He enjoyed the shivers that chased over his skin as his lips moved over hers, flicking the tip of his tongue over her lip, grinning when she made a move to chase it. “What was it?”

“Let's hear it for the boy?”

Her eyes opened slowly, her hands stilling where they'd been playing with the short hair that covered the curve of his skull. When she noticed he was smiling, the blissed expression faded into confusion, Melody's body leaning away from his before scowling. Hand smacking his chest, she shoved at Tommy to try and push him away.

“What's wrong, Mel?” He teased, twisting beneath her hands before leaning in to kiss her again, his lips curling into a smile against hers when she growled at him from behind her closed mouth.

“You're a bastard.” Melody hissed, turning her head away when he tried to kiss her again, curling up on the shelf to try and kick him away. “That wasn't funny!”

“And actin' like you were goin' to be doin' somethin' you weren't was?” Tommy let out a soft grunt when her heel caught his hip, his leg giving out for a moment before he snatched her off the shelf, her legs instinctively wrapping around his waist. 

“Put me down.” Her fingers dug into his shoulders, eyes going wide as the intimate press registered, though her leg's grip didn't loosen. “Please.”

“One kiss.” He swallowed thickly, his fingers digging into her hips at the rush of heat that rolled through him. “Kiss me and I'll put you down.”

He hadn't actually thought the move through, he'd just meant to avoid another kick that might have hit him in a more tender place, but now that he had her there he was loathe to bring the closeness to an end. Slowly moving one hand up and beneath her sweater, he smoothed his palm over her lower back and up her spine watching her shiver as the cold air brushed the skin he was exposing as the fabric lifted. Tommy wasn't entirely sure he'd let her down even if she did kiss him, letting out a slow breath at just how good it felt to have her like she was.

It felt even better when she kissed him, her hips grinding lightly as she shifted, mouth slanting across his as her arms wrapped around his neck to keep herself from falling. Her mouth opened slowly, her tongue slicking his lower lip before he opened his to taste her, the low sound that vibrated between them making his fingers dig in deep enough to bruise. It wasn't until the shed door banged open, the sound sudden and sharp, that they stopped, her forehead resting against his as they both tried to catch their breath.

“I should go home.” Melody finally said softly, her arms loosing their hold but not making any effort to put her feet on the ground. “Snow's supposed to be falling soon.”

“You could stay the night.”

“Oh my God, no, my papa would kill me.”

Tommy shivered when she rested her head on his shoulder, her lips mouthing at his neck lazily before she nuzzled her face into the crook of it. He'd been half joking when he'd blurted out the offer, but the more he thought about it the more he liked it, wrapping his arms around her waist to steady her.

“He could try.” He shot back, grinning at the groan the bragging got in response. “Your old man wouldn't know what hit him if he tried.”

“I would, and I'd make you regret it.”

Melody's reluctance to unwrap her legs was making it harder for Tommy to concentrate, his mind going fuzzy when she finally slid down, a soft sound catching in his throat at the sensation. It'd be worth Melody throwing a fit over him knocking out her father if it meant she didn't have to go. Before she could say it again, he kissed her, the constriction of his arms forcing the air from her lungs. She didn't seem to mind, and he didn't mind that her nails sank into the back of his neck trying to pull him closer, his head jerking upwards at the sound of a car horn.

“I think it'd be worth knockin' your old man on his ass, I really do.”

“Shut up, Tommy.” Kissing him again, she squirmed loose and tugged her sweater down, evading him when he reached out to pull her back. “Stop it!”

“Just one more, okay?” He stared at her confused when her face turned red, eyes flying up to his before moving to stare at something over his shoulder. “What?”

“It's one thing to- I mean, God.” Clearing her throat, she tugged on the sleeves of her sweater. 

“What're you- Oh.” Tommy smirked, tucking his thumb into the waistband and toying with it. “You want to see it?”

“Ye- No! Oh my God just stop.”

“C'mere.”

“No! Just- You have to stop, I'm going home.” 

Tommy caught her before she made it out of the shed, pulling her back against him and burying his face in her hair as her struggles caused her to grind back against him. It almost hurt, feeling that good, until he saw Melody's father climbing out of the car and walking up the drive to go to the front door.

“Stop, just- Fuck, okay, okay.” His voice was rough, his hand splaying across her stomach. “Give me one more kiss and then go home, I'll see you tomorrow, right?”

“Yeah,” Melody turned her head to kiss him quickly, before breaking loose and almost flying across the yard to run in the back door.

Slower to follow, Tommy tugged his shirt lower before closing his eyes and carefully moving the band of his sweatpants over the head of his cock to try and hide the erection. Coughing, he groaned, hunching over and making his way into the house to say good night to his mother before retreating to his room. It took a surprising amount of time to take care of that particular problem, staring up at the ceiling after he'd cleaned up any mess and tried to avoid another round in lieu of going to sleep. He lost that round, biting on his lower lip against the groan he almost let out at the phantom sensation of her kiss, and the way her legs had felt wrapped around him struck him like a sucker punch.


	8. Chapter 8

“Merry Christmas, Tommy!”

“What the fu-” Staggering forward to avoid sprawling, he tucked his arms behind him to help keep Melody from falling, his books scattered in front of him. “Mel, what the hell are you- Christmas ain't until next week!”

“Yeah but I got you a present!” Her voice was a low whisper, lips brushing over his ear as she held the small package in front of his face. It was bright red and more like tin foil than paper, flat and would balance nicely on the palm of his hand. “I want you to open it, open it right now!”

“Jesus,” Tommy gasped, when she wrapped her arms around his throat after he'd taken the gift, swatting at her knee to coax her to get down. “Shouldn't I be waitin' for Christmas to open this?”

When she didn't answer, her knees tightening on his waist as she loosened her grip to dangle her arms on his shoulders, he rolled his eyes upwards before fumbling with the wrapping paper. It took him a moment to find an edge that wasn't taped down, but even as he found it Melody snatched it out of his hands and unwrapped it for him. Staring at the CD case she held proudly in front of his face, he felt his lips twitch before realizing the cover was the two of them doing homework on the couch, more accurately the two of them just before kissing after giving up on the pretense of homework.

“Holy sh- Who took this?!”

“My Mama, she thought it was sweet.” Flicking the case open, she muttered when a piece of notebook paper fell to the floor, hopping off his back to pick it up. 

Tommy didn't know what to do about the suddenly shy expression, her chin tucked to her chest, his fingers awkwardly holding the CD case she'd let fall into his hands before grabbing the note. Staring down at the CD, he read the titles and frowned not recognizing half of them, turning the case over in his hand to see another picture of them on the back, one that he did recognize. Snorting softly beneath his breath, he smiled at the memory, he'd been showing Melody the proper way to hold her arms while fighting, mimicking the stance and having her throw a punch like he'd shown her.

“What's the note?” He asked without looking up, he had to admit it was worth the bruises he got showing her the wrong way to do something, to see her looking so good when she did it right. “Is it some sappy love thing?”

“Maybe,” hesitantly she held it out for him, yanking it back to stare at him pleadingly. “You don't get to laugh, or- You know what, just take the CD, the note doesn't exist.”

“Mel...” Brow furrowed, he watched her tuck the note into her pocket before bending to pick up the books she'd caused to spill. “Give me the note, Mel.”

“What note? You mean the one that doesn't exist?”

She screeched when he lunged towards her, ducking to the side and running down the hallway with him hot on her heels. The faces of students and teachers blurred, his gaze focused on Melody, his shoulders clearing a path when someone wasn't smart enough to move on their own. Tommy literally could not figure out how she moved through the crowd like it was water, while he on the other hand felt like he was moving through mud.

“Melody! Just give me the fuckin' note!”

“No!”

Muttering curses beneath his breath, he watched her turn the corner at the end of the hallway and hazarded a guess on where she'd go. Hands slamming against a suddenly opened door, he let out a grunt at the sting before turning down the hallway on his left and sending someone sprawling as he tried to make up time. He'd only had a vague interest in the note that had fallen to the floor, that was until Melody had panicked, now it was likened to the Holy Grail and the Golden Fleece in one.

“Jesus, Tommy, watch where you're going!”

“Holy shi- My books!”

“Mr. Conlon! No running in the hallway!”

The complaints became a low buzz as he tried to catch up to Melody, finally catching sight of her as she made her way outside to the Quad. Tasting victory he darted into a classroom and yanked open a window, ignoring the shouts and commands to close it and timing it just right to throw himself out it and catch Melody in a running tackle.

“Give me the note!” Tommy huffed in her ear, an arm wrapped tightly around her waist as he tried to hold her to dig in her pocket with the other.

“Where the hell did you- Did you jump out of the window?!” Hands slapping at his roaming one, she squirmed and struggled to get loose. “You jumped out of a freaking window?!”

“Yeah, and I think that means I earned that note.”

“I said there was no note! Get off me!”

Tommy's foot slipped in the ankle deep snow, sending them both into the wet fluff as he tried to grab her wrists to pin them. Letting out a sharp sound when her knee almost caught him in the groin, he smacked her legs down to sit on them before continuing to scramble to catch her hands which were shoving and slapping at his chest.

“Just give up Mel, you ain't goin' to win this.”

“Tommy, we're going to get expelled, just stop.”

The panic in her voice made him pause, his fingers wrapped around one wrist as he felt the other slam palm down on his stomach. 

“You goin' to give me the note?” 

Watching her pant, fingers moving to skim over the bulge the paper made in her pocket, he waited patiently for her answer. When she minutely shook her head, he sighed and made a dive for it, hand sliding off her hip and into the snow. Curses pouring over his lips at the cold, he managed to get the tips of his fingers into her pocket only to pull them back when she hit his jaw with a closed fist. Blinking down at her in surprise, he shook his head and finally managed to pin her hands down in the snow only to have her almost throw him off as her body heaved and twisted.

“For fuck's sake Mel, it ain't like you declared your undying love for me or somethin', just give me the stupid note.” When she didn't respond, he stared down at her in surprise, his heart skipping a beat as he tried to get his throat to stop closing. “Melody, you didn't do that, right?”

“Just leave it alone, okay?”

Tommy considered it highly unfair that she'd started crying, tears rolling down her temples to add to her already soaked hair. Digging the note out of her pocket, he tucked it into the back pocket of his jeans, watching the tears roll and the way she wouldn't look at him. Carefully letting her hands go, he pushed himself to his feet, brushing the snow from his shins, and licked his lips as she angrily brushed the tears away. He wasn't expecting Melody to kick his legs out from beneath him, his breath leaving him in a rush as his back hit the ground.

“How are you supposed to get the note out of my back pocket if you're sittin' on me?” He grumbled, glancing at her hands that were pushing his shoulders into the snow. “I don't think you thought this one through, babe.”

“Oh?” Sniffing, she rubbed her nose on her shoulder, before turning her attention back to him with a smile. “If the paper gets wet the ink will run and you won't be able to read it.”

The smug look on his face faded with dawning comprehension, his hands gripping her waist and throwing her off of him as he rolled onto his stomach, legs working to run before he'd even levered himself off the ground properly. Running like the hounds of hell were chasing him, he ducked around the corner of the building and made a dash for the lunchroom, dragging the note out of his pocket and into his fist as he ran. He almost made it, the lunchroom doors mere feet away, but his foot landed on a patch of ice and twisted, his shoulder hitting the ground moments before his head did the same. Dazed he stared at nothing, his shoulder burning as his head throbbed before rolling to try pushing himself to his feet only to sprawl out on the cold ground.

“Tommy!”

Rolling his eyes to see Melody skid over the same patch of ice that had laid him low, he scowled before cringing as his shoulder gave a loud complaint. A tentative attempt to move his arm informed him that something bad had happened, teeth gritting as he tried to think around the fuzzy sensation that was filling his head.

“Are you okay?” Melody's fingertips lightly trailed over the back of his head, letting out a shaky exhale when they came free wet only from sweat and snow. “I thought- God... Are you okay? Say something, dammit!”

“Stop yellin', for the love of-” Using his good arm, he levered himself off the ground and slowly onto his knees. “Did you not see my head hit the fuckin' ground? And you're yellin' at me. What is wrong with you?”

“You!” She looked contrite immediately, her voice lower when she started talking again. “I don't think your head is bleeding, so you're okay, right? That looked really bad.”

Partially numb fingers brushing over his shoulder, he let out a low sound of relief. A dislocated shoulder was by far preferable to something being broken, though the pain was staring to make itself known as his head cleared.

“I dislocated my shoulder, just give me a bit for my head to stop buzzin' and I'll fix it.”

“You're going to- Tommy, we have to go to the nurse.” When he snorted and then winced, Melody gave him a shove. “I mean it! You're going to the nurse right now!”

“For the love of God and all his Angels, stop fuckin' yellin'!” Cradling his head, he sent a narrow eyed look her way out of his left while his right stayed firmly closed. “It's dislocated not broken.”

“How would you even know how to fix it?” Melody scoffed, standing and carefully helping him to his feet as well. “Just let me take you to the nurse.”

“I used to wrestle, it ain't the first time it's happened, Mel.”

“So you're literally just going to pop it back in, all on your own? Tommy, I don't think two months counts as 'used to wrestle'.” Staring at him offended when he twisted away from the arm she'd put around his waist, she slid her hands into her pockets instead. “You're being stubborn. I've heard about those, it's going to hurt worse the longer you leave it like that.”

“Two months... Mel I used to wrestle all the time back in the 'Burg, alright? I can fix my shoulder just fine without women cryin' all over me.” 

“Well how would I know that, you never talk about it.”

“There ain't nothin' to talk about!” Gritting his teeth, he started working the joint, letting out a pained grunt when it strained before slipping back into place. “This wouldn't have happened if you just let me read the note.”

“Please don't.” Her hands were hovering just shy of touching him, staring at his shoulder as he slowly rotated it before holding his arm tight to his body. “It's one of those things that seems like a really good idea and then it's actually not.”

“Do you think my books and stuff are still in the hallway? I fuckin' hope so because my Christmas present's with them.”

“Tommy, I mean it, just don't read the note.”

“I'll be pissed if I don't even get to listen to it once, you'll have to make another one.”

“You are such a- Tommy!”

“My head is killin' me, I'm freezin', the least you could do is stop yellin' and help me go get my stuff since it's your fault I'm half lame.” Ignoring her sputtered protests, he played with the paper still crumpled in his fist and hoped it was worth almost breaking his neck over.

He was still trying to puzzle out what could be in it, slouched low in a chair in the principal's office, the nurse brusquely sifting through his hair in search of the spot where his head had slammed down on frozen concrete. Wincing while she prodded it, he listened with a half ear to the lecture that seemed to have been going on for a good six hours instead of just fifteen minutes. Melody at least looked properly apologetic, sniffling and wiping at her nose with the tissue the principal had handed her, nodding occasionally and looking so down about the whole thing Tommy could tell the principal was going to lessen the sentence.

“You can't just do things like that in a school, one of you,” His eyes flicked towards Tommy, who returned the look with an unrepentant scowl. “Could have hurt someone. Melody, I would have thought you at least knew better.”

“Leave her alone, it was all scientific.”

“Care to explain that, Mr. Conlon?”

“Yeah. Fight or flight.”

“Excuse you?” The tone was incredulous, the principal's eyebrows lifting as he stared at Tommy who was trying to get away from the nurse's not so tender mercies.

“You know, that thing all animals got. They either fight it out or they run.” Finally tired of the sharp bursts of pain the woman was causing him, he swatted her hands away, snarling at her when she tried to continue. “And considerin' I've got a hell of a lot more muscle than she does, you can see why she'd run.”

“Were you bullying, Ms. Morgenstern?”

“No!” 

“Then why would she run?” His gaze flicked towards Melody again who had turned an interesting shade of red before hiding her face behind her hands. 

“Because I wanted to do somethin' lewd since she got me a Christmas present,” Tommy shrugged his good shoulder before clarifying. “Which I got early, so I figure I had to do somethin' really good to thank her for it.”

“And what about this note the two of you were yelling about as you caused mayhem in the hallways?”

“What note?” Tommy deadpanned.

Four hours later, while the two of them were sitting in detention, Tommy pulled the note out from his pocket and slowly opened it behind the stack of books in front of him. The precaution was unnecessary, the teacher in charge was far too engrossed in the book he was reading but Tommy felt better erring on the side of caution. Some of the ink had begun to run but not enough that the words were illegible, and he started to wish that he'd waited until after detention to read it.

But just as the words were making sense the teacher snatched it out of his hands, leaving him with a blank corner and what felt like a minor heart attack. Staring up at the teacher who was recrumpling the note in his hand, Tommy fought against the urge to jump out of his seat and take it back by force. All he'd really gotten to see was his name, and what looked like Bon Jovi before having it taken away. Hands curling into fists, he watched as the teacher threw it away in the trash can by his desk, propping his feet up and continuing to read. Making plans to get the note afterward, Tommy let out a long suffering sigh as he started on the busy work he'd been assigned.

Detention passed slowly, but it was easy to out maneuver Melody after they stopped by their lockers, peeking out of the boy's bathroom to run back to the classroom to dig the note out of the trash. His plan fell apart the moment he found the small canister empty, kicking it back beneath the desk as he roughly scrubbed at his hair, letting some of his anger out with a slow breath through his nose. Still furious at being thwarted, he sat in the backseat of Melody's father's car and brooded the whole way home, barely remembering to kiss her cheek as he threw himself out to trudge up the steps.


	9. Chapter 9

He'd spent about a week talking to his mother about Melody, in hopes that she'd miraculously figure out something to give his girlfriend, and came up with nothing. Had even managed to sneak into the kitchen while they were studying at her house to talk to her mother in case she'd have something in mind. Mothers, Tommy finally decided, were worthless when it came to dating advice, but he couldn't quite bring himself to ask her father. Not that the Morgenstern patriarch had ever been anything but congenial towards him, but he just wasn't comfortable asking what to get the man's daughter for Christmas.

Finally he cane up with, in not only his opinion but both mothers as well, the perfect Christmas present for Melody. It took ages to get the materials together, especially since Melody seemed to be the kind of girl that loved Christmas and everything to do with it, she'd even managed to wrangle a promise from him to go caroling with her and a few of her chorus friends. Sneaking around behind her back to talk to her mother about getting a hand with the present before barricading himself in his mother's room to get it finished in time.

The community center had a Christmas dance, which he'd also made serious effort to avoid like it was capable of giving him the plague, but his mother had threatened to walk out into the two feet of snow that covered the lawn if he didn't. So once more, arm twisted ruthlessly, he found himself agreeing to do something that at any other time he'd have considered felonious actions to avoid. But it felt good, watching his mother sip on eggnog on the Morgenstern's couch, listening with a half ear to the conversation as curled up comfortably on the floor near her hip playing some kind of Christmas twisted version of Go Fish with Melody.

At one point he made sure that he caught his mother beneath the mistletoe, wrapping an arm around her waist and carefully dipping her to exaggeratedly kiss her to make her laugh. He didn't even mind the applause from the Morgenstern's, grinning down at his mother before slowly pulling her back up, happily accepting the enthusiastic embrace and merry laughter in his ear. Memories of past Christmases kept trying to swarm to the fore, but he ruthlessly shoved them back, instead focusing on the gingersnaps his mother had made, and the way Melody nipped the tips of his fingers when she stole a bite before grinning at him impishly.

Two days until Christmas, he watched Melody run around her house, making last minute changes and in general making him feel jittery with how she wouldn't sit still for even a moment. In a desperate bid for a moment of peace, he tucked a finger into one of the belt loops on her jeans and yanked her on top of him where he' was sprawled on the couch.

“Mel!” Letting out a soft grunt when her elbow buried itself in his stomach, he struggled to keep her on the couch and not scrambling to adjust the Christmas lights that were apparently a whole millimeter off. “For fuck's sake the place looks like Father Christmas went on a cookie binge and focused only on your house. It looks great.”

“Tommy you don't get it, I need it to be perfect!”

“Why? It's just a holiday.”

The horrified gasp that garnered had him hurriedly wrapping his arms around her to pin the likely flail he'd induced, grinning up at her as she straddled his waist and tried to pull herself loose. Pinning her hands to his chest, he leaned upward to kiss her chin and jaw since the idea of having a swollen lip on Christmas wasn't exactly ideal. The idea of getting caught by her parents wasn't ideal either but that didn't stop him from enjoying the way she kissed him once she'd settled down, or the way her hands bunched the fabric of his shirt when he coaxed her mouth open to dip his tongue inside.

Fingers tangling in her hair, he grinned into the kiss, tasting the soft noises she made as she squirmed, her hands sliding beneath his shirt to run her palms up to his chest and back down his sides. He liked this part, a lot, the roll of her hips, the way his body felt like it was catching fire as he tried to stop himself from taking it too far. It didn't help that she didn't seem to have a stop moment, or the fact that even when his hands slipped into the back of her pants she didn't stop him, if anything she ground down harder. She was going to be the death of him if they didn't do something soon.

A throat clearing broke them apart, though only their lips, Tommy's hands still tangled in her hair as he grinned up at her sheepishly, thumbs brushing over her temples as he leaned up for one more quick press before reluctantly working his fingers free and tugging his shirt down over his stomach. The fact that both of her parents seemed to be incredibly amused by the tenuous restraint the young couple had left Tommy feeling awkward every time her mother smiled at him. Almost as if she were already planning what the two of them would be doing after high school, the whole shebang, and the fact that it didn't send him running for the hills made his stomach knot at night sometimes as he was going to sleep.

“Is your mother feeling well enough to come over for Christmas dinner, Tommy?”

“Um,” Clearing his throat as Melody moved to let him swing his legs off the couch, he scooted closer to the arm of the couch and glanced out the living room window. “I don't know if that's a good idea, there's supposed to be a storm or somethin' and if we come over for dinner I don't want to try walkin' her home after.”

“Don't be silly, we've got a spare room she can stay in for the night if the snow's that bad, we'll drive you both home in the morning.”

Blinking slowly, his mouth opened only to close, head nodding as he shifted to cross his legs to hide the erection that was refusing to go limp. Melody's mother, God bless her, acted as though she hadn't even noticed, though it may have to do a lot with the fact that her eggnog was spiked with a cinnamon spiced rum and she was on her third glass. Making his excuses, he kissed Melody's cheek and headed home to collect his mother for the Christmas meal they were invited to. He wasn't entirely sure that she'd want to go, no that was a lie, he wasn't sure he wanted to go. With the sudden boost to his mother's help, he selfishly wanted to spend Christmas at home alone, just the two of them, but even as he thought it he knew it would be a terrible idea. Reluctantly accepting the ride Melody's father offered, and the ride back for him and his mother both.

Just sitting on the end of her bed and talking about the possibilities, the memories of fighting over the biggest slice of pie with Brendan, or the way his father had looked with a Santa hat on his thick mane of hair as he carved the ham. Maybe it would be better to spend the holidays with the Morgensterns, besides they had a spread of cookies that had his mouth watering every time he thought about it. But if his mother shot it down he wouldn't push. 

Tommy shouldn't have bothered worrying, his mother was talking to Melody's mother by the time he made it home, pausing in the entryway to shake off the snow that had landed on his shoulders just on the short walk from the car to the house. He had about two minutes to get over his shock as his mother packed an overnight bag for them both, smiling so broadly Tommy felt his chest warm and happily helped her into her coat. His throat closed when she tilted her head back to stare up at the falling snow, her fingers gripping his upper arm tightly to pull him to a stop.

“It's a White Christmas Thomas, look.”

“We're in Washington, mom, of course it is.”

“Don't you sass me, how can you not be excited about a White Christmas?” 

There was something in the tone of her voice that made his stomach lurch, his teeth catching his lower lip at the implications his mind took from it. This Christmas could be the last one, could be the last time they spent the holidays smiling and laughing, and suddenly he wanted to take her back into the house and shut out the world. As much as he wanted to spend Christmas sneaking around behind the parents' backs to kiss beneath the mistletoe, or up to her room for a heavy make out session, the reconfirmation that it might be their last Christmas-

“What the hell was that?!” He squawked, pawing at the sudden cold on his neck, his eyes widening when he saw that his mother had scooped a handful of snow off the hood of the car and actually threw it at him. “Are you crazy?”

“You will not mope on Christmas, you understand me? Or do I have to hit you with another snowball?”

“You've lost your mi- Mom! Put the snowball down, c'mon!”   
The next one hit him square in the face, mostly because he'd assumed she wouldn't actually throw it, wiping his face as dry as he was able before realizing that his mother had made it into the car with the help of Melody's father. Grumbling, he reached out for the handle of the back door only to slip and fall flat on his back, staring up at the falling snow with enough annoyance he was surprised that it didn't melt before it landed on his face. The ride back to Melody's house was sound tracked by his mother's laughter and then the hushed conversation of the adults talking about Christmases they'd celebrated as children.

Another snowball was waiting for him when they got back to the house, Melody's laughter filling his ears as his head snapped to glare at her over his shoulder, handing over the job of getting his mother into the house to her father to ball up a handful of the fluff. Before he even had a chance to launch it, another one caught him on the side of his face, leaving his cheek stinging as he finally threw his only to miss. Deciding that his aim probably wasn't going to get any better, Tommy dashed around the front of the car and charged her. He tackled her into the snow that had built up, shoveling a handful of snow onto her face as she squealed about the cold. They spent an hour tearing up the lawn, more often than not, Tommy found himself dealing with not only the sting of a snow ball hitting him, but to his pride as well when most of his attempts missed. There was no shortage of snow to throw Melody into, or for her to throw apparently, yet they still managed to stain their knees with mud as they scrambled to try to out do each other.

“What'd you get me for Christmas?” Melody yelled at him, the sound of a snowball hitting the side of the mailbox as he ran past it causing him to put on an extra burst of speed.

“I can't tell you that, that'd defeat the point of callin' it a Christmas Present.”

“If I promised to still act surprised when I got it, could you tell me what it is?”

“Not a chance in-” Cursing softly as he found himself rolling in the snow, Tommy shook it off and launched a handful of snow at Melody and cheered for himself when it actually hit her. “No, no way, do you have any idea how hard I worked on makin' just the right thing?”

“You made me something? Really? What is it? If I guess right will you tell me?”

Taking advantage of her distraction, Tommy tacked her into the snow again, getting a two handfuls of snow shoved into his face for his trouble. Still smiling, he pinned her hands above her head and scooped up as much as he could, holding it over her face as he pretended to listen to her begging before letting it slide off his palm to splatter on her forehead.

“Nope. You'll have to wait til tomorrow night, your mom already said it'd be alright if you opened on present early.”

“Or you could let me open it tonight and rewrap it so they don't know.”

“Well it ain't really wrapped, but its got a ribbon on it.” Purposefully letting a hint of innuendo slip into his tone, he grinned at her shocked expression. “All you'll have to do is slip the ribbon off, and play with it. Ain't I generous, givin' you a piece of me on the Holidays?”

“Tommy... you're not- I mean you wouldn't- My Papa-”

“Is in on it.”

“What!? There is no way my Papa is okay with us doing... That!” Her already red cheeks burned hotter as she stared up at him mortified.

“That what?”

“You know, se- Why are you laughing?”

“Did you really think I was goin' to tie a ribbon on it and tell your parents I was goin' to? Do I look suicidal to you? Nah I did somethin' else, but I really think you'll like it.”

Melody stared up at him seething before surprising him with a handful of snow that sent melted snow dripping into his ear, another handful going down the back of his shirt and earning her the chance to escape as he reached back with both hands to try and shake it loose from his shirt. Even being tackled into the snow didn't bother him much, howling with laughter as she continued to fill his clothing with snow as she berated him for the tease.

Shivering in the entryway, Tommy watched Melody run up the stairs to her room before slowly peeling off his soaked clothing. Even as his mother scolded him for staying out too long, he chafed his arms and avoided meeting her eyes because he couldn't stop smiling. Skin blue and pimpling he still felt warm from the way her body had molded to his, her knees gripping his waist as they'd rolled in the snow, her hands slamming a handful of snow on the back of his head before pulling him down for a kiss that had warmed him to his toes. Toweling himself off, he pulled out the sweater his mother had packed as well as the sweatpants with a grateful sigh, the cold seemed to have settled to his bones though his cheeks were burning at the amused looks that both mothers were sending his way as he stepped out of the bathroom.

He still wasn't sure that staying the weekend was a great idea, but the idea of helping Melody's mother prepare Christmas Dinner had made his mother so happy he hadn't been able to think of a single thing to say against it. Falling asleep on the couch with the Christmas lights blinking softly in the corner had been easier than he thought, the afghan more than warm enough as he tried to get comfortable on the almost too small couch. The thought of sneaking up to Melody's room to sleep with her passed through his mind as he yawned, throwing a leg over the back of the couch before setting it aside, there was only so far he was willing to push his luck, besides which he wasn't entirely sure he'd be able to keep his hands to himself. Or Melody could for that matter.

Melody singing in the shower woke him up, blearily looking around and trying to figure out where he was before abruptly sitting up and scrubbing his hands over his face. Apparently she'd forgotten about Tommy sleeping on the couch too, walking out of the bathroom in a towel that barely covered her thighs and humming before catching sight of his wide eyed stare and ducking back into the bathroom. It was going to be a very long day with that image burned into his mind, falling back and rolling to face the couch with a groan in an attempt to go back to sleep. Tommy jumped, startled by the fingers lightly playing over the back of his head, cautiously turning his head to find his mother smiling down at him and feeling his lips twist into a sleepy smile of his own.

“Happy Christmas Eve, Tommy.”


	10. Chapter 10

Tommy had been more than happy to pretend that the Christmas dance didn't exist, that it had been canceled by the light snowfall that had been going on all day, until he saw Melody walking down the stairs. The sapphire dress made her skin glow, the heels she'd be wearing held in hand, her eyes sparkling at the look of shock. Reaching the landing she took his hand and spun, the hem of her dress lifting around her knees, laughing when Tommy wrapped an arm around her waist as she came to a stop. The bright flash of a camera going off didn't even register, nor did the soft smile on his lips as he slowly looked her over.

“You look amazin', babe.” Words husky, he leaned down to kiss her, coming to an abrupt halt when the second blinding flash registered. “If you ever get famous, I ain't goin' anywhere with you.”

“Yes you will, you wouldn't trust anyone else to look out for me and you know it.” Pressing her lips against his quickly, she slipped out of his grip to grab her coat and shove her feet into her boots. “Hurry up and get your jacket, Papa says you can borrow the car as long as you promise not to crash it.”

She teased him most of the dance for the four close calls on their way to the community center due to hidden ice, using them as black mail to talk him into dancing with her after he'd sworn that short of death he wouldn't. Ignoring the other couples on the floor, and instead concentrating on his feet, Tommy made it through one dance and considered his job complete, only to have his hopes dashed when Melody's arms wrapped firmly around his shoulders and she kissed his cheek. Despite the muttered complaints, he enjoyed the way she fit in his arms, her voice soft in his ear as she sang along with the song. It helped immensely that she'd guided them to the edge of the dance floor near the door where a cold draft blew in and few people were brave enough to visit. Grabbing his jacket from where he'd tossed it, he wrapped it around her shoulders after feeling her shiver, rolling his eyes at Melody when she cuddled it close.

“This band kind of sucks.” She whispered into his ear, the dancing more of a swaying hug as he nuzzled her neck. “I don't think they've managed to keep the pitch consistent through any of the songs.”

“What's that?”

“Can't you hear it? It's like they're not even trying!”

“I'm in the middle of something else.” Tommy grinned when she shivered, sliding his hands down to lift her, teeth grazing the crook of her neck playfully. “I think your stuff sounds better anyways.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, especially when you don't even mean to, like when we're doin' homework and you just start singin' 'cause you're gettin' frustrated.” Laughing when his ear felt hot from the flush on her cheeks, he pulled back to kiss her, confused when she didn't kiss him back. “I'm just sayin' it's cute, that's all.”

“Do you ever think about it?”

“ 'Bout what?” Tommy asked completely lost at the abrupt topic change, even more so when she wouldn't meet his eyes and hid her face in his shoulder. “Can I get a hint?”

“You know, _it_.”

“Oh.”

“I was talking to Tabitha, and she did it with Jacob, and then I was thinking about it but I didn't want to say anything because it's just kind of weird to talk about, right? But I like when we're kissing and-” Melody trailed off, and he felt her swallow hard before continuing. “If you want to we could, I mean I heard it hurts but I'm pretty sure I could handle it? Not that I'm saying you'd hurt me on purpose but-”

“Holy sh- You're just goin' to drop this on me like that? You can't just- Jesus H. Mel...”

“So, you don't want to?”

“I didn't say that.” Setting her back on her feet, he grabbed her wrists and made her move back enough that he could see her face again. “I'm just a bit- Is this 'cause I made that joke about tyin' a ribbon around my-”

“No!” Giving him a light shove, she pulled his jacket tighter around herself, gaze dropping to the floor as her fingers gripped the edge so hard the zipper bit into the soft flesh of her fingers.. “Maybe. A bit. But I was thinking about it after the shed thing, too! And I just- Do you want to?”

“Right now?”

“Oh my God...”

“Okay, good. Not right now.” Hand scrubbing over his face, he stared at her for a minute before nodding, his words at first muffled by his palm. “Yeah, I think about it a lot, but it ain't like it's the only thing, Mel. I think 'bout how you look while you're smilin', and singin', and stuff, too! Can't you just have figured this out or somethin'?!”

“Well how else was I supposed to figure it out? It's not like I'm psychic or something.”

“You couldn't tell that I want to-” Completely done with the conversation, he let out a soft huff of laughter, reaching out to grab her to pull her close as he resumed the slow swaying motion they'd been doing before. “How 'bout this; we do one more dance, then head back to your house and you can open your present?”

“What if I want to after our parents go to bed?”

“I don't know why you'd want to wait 'til they went to bed to open you're present, you seemed real excited about it earlier.” The moment the words were out of his mouth he felt like an idiot, his whole body going still as his mind flooded with images that had his cheeks flushing and left him clearing his throat to stall. “You're not goin' to let this go, are you?”

“If you want, we can act like I never brought it up.”

“It's a bit late for that.” Tommy muttered, rolling his eyes. “Now I'm goin' to be thinkin' 'bout it all the time wonderin' if you were serious or bein' a girl and thinkin' it was the 'thoughtful thing to do'.”

“Do other girls actually do that?”

“I don't know, but you ain't like the other girls so I wouldn't put it past you. In a good way.” Realizing that the odd taste on his tongue, was his foot slowly but surely being inched down his throat, Tommy sighed, unresisting when she cuddled close again, arms looping around his shoulders. “You know most girls want to talk about feelin's and bein' together forever, but you... You want to talk about fuckin' and I don't even know where to start with that.”

“Well you talk about it with your guy friends, right? Why is it any different talking about it with me?”

“I don't want to have sex with them, that's what's different!”

He could practically feel the happiness that caused her in the way she shook with laughter as she pressed a kiss to his throat. Muttering under his breath about girlfriends, and just girls in general, he ignored the broad grin he could feel against his jaw when she kissed him again. Hands sliding around her waist, he couldn't help the hesitancy behind the kiss when she pressed closer to him, her fingers playing with his hair. Tommy chuckled when she went still, her eyes opening wide at the feel of him through the dress slacks he wore.

“You know we don't have to, right? I mean I'd like to but it ain't all that important.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Good.” Relieved that the out of the blue discussion was over, he wasn't prepared for the feeling of her fingers tentatively moving down his chest and stopping around his navel. “Mel... Stop, thought we just said-”

“That we don't have to, I know, but,” taking a slow breath, she slid her fingers lower, stopping when they came in contact with his belt. “I kind of want to.”

“I don't think this is a 'kind of want to' thing, Melody.” 

“Alright, fine. I want to.”

“Jesus!” Taking hold of her wrist, Tommy stopped her descent and held her hand away from him as he tried to remember how to breathe. “You been drinkin' without me or somethin'?”

“No.” He felt a stab of guilt over how small her voice sounded, the way she pulled away from him to stare at the ground. “I just figured if I asked, you'd be okay with it, and it'd just sort of happen.”

“At the fuckin' school dance...”

“No! Don't be-” Yanking her wrist away from him, she glared at him before staring moodily at the ground. “Why are you making this so awkward?”

“Me? I'm not the one who brought it up out of left field, or almost groped you in front of everyone!”

“That's a bit much, don't you think?”

“Fine, not everyone, but there's always someone lookin'.” Not liking the way she was staring at him, or the tell tale blush that was stealing across his cheeks, his voice was harsher than normal with embarrassment. “I bet there's at least one group of girls gigglin' over the fact we're over here in the corner, which means five.”

“Tommy?”

“What?”

“Are you- Well you know... Are you a-”

Her eyes widened when his hand clamped over her mouth, the arm that had only loosely been circling her waist, tightening as he moved them further into the corner. He didn't move his hand away for a long while as he stared down at her, even when he did it was slow with the silent understanding that she wasn't to continue that line of inquiry.

“So, that's a yes.”

“That's a 'Shut up and stop talkin' 'bout it'.”

“Well that's a good thing isn't it? I mean, it'd be nice if one of us knew what they were doing, but it's kind of-”

“Stop, just fuckin' stop, okay?” Feeling offended when Melody started laughing, Tommy scowled at her until she stopped. “I don't know why you're fuckin' laughin', it ain't funny.”

“It kind of is...”

There was no stopping her laughter, it was random, and each time that it happened Tommy scowled and glared at her. Even on the ride back to her house, after he'd turned on the radio to the first station that wasn't half static and blared it, she still tried to talk to him about it and he shut her down. It wasn't until they were pulling into the driveway that she finally turned the radio off with a twist of her wrist and stared at him expectantly.

“What?”

“So you are.”

“Yeah, alright? For the love of Christ, can we just not talk about it anymore?” Flicking his gaze in her direction when she shifted, his hands slowly slid off the steering wheel, realizing that she was sliding across the seat towards him.

“Then we're done talking about it.”

Arm going around her as she slid to sit sideways on his lap, Tommy stared at her surprised, eyes slipping towards the obviously open blinds of the living room window then back to her. 

“Someone's watchin' and I'd rather not be sent home, alone, on Christmas.”

“They're not going to send you home, Tommy, we haven't done anything yet.”

Giving her a doubtful look, he opened his mouth to continue arguing and then had his words die on the tip of his tongue when her hand slowly smoothed down his chest. There had to be laws against this, serious laws, the kind that made sure girlfriend's didn't lose their minds and start groping and things like that. Not that he stopped her when she leaned the short distance that had their lips meeting, his fingers digging into her thigh as he tried to pull her closer. He didn't even make a token effort to stop her when she pulled his shirt loose from the waistband of his slacks and smoothed her hand over his stomach.

“Mel...” His hips shifted restlessly, a low groan in his throat when she nipped at his lower lip, hand lifting to tangle in the hair do that she'd spent an hour on at least, and destroying it in a matter of seconds as he took control of the kiss.

He wasn't even sure he was remembering to breathe, not that it mattered, Melody was making that soft sound in her throat, and there was a hint of the fruit punch they'd had at the dance on her tongue. It wasn't helping anything at all that she'd threaded her fingers behind his head, twisting in his lap and making him flinch when her knee almost landed between his legs before diving in for another kiss. There was no getting tired of kissing Melody, his hands roaming up her back before smoothing back down to grip her hips and awkwardly try to pull them down, staring at her from beneath heavy eye lids as he pulled back long enough to catch his breath.

“Shit.”

“What is it?”

Melody kissed the corner of his mouth, and he wasn't sure why but he liked that too, liked the way she played keep away before giving in to kiss him until both of their lips were swollen. There had been something, something that was important, but that soft sound was back, the one that sounded like she was humming something he couldn't quite catch. Whatever it was, it could wait just five more minu-

The two of them almost jumped out of their skin, Tommy's ears ringing from the screech that Melody let out, his cheek burning where her nail had caught it as she moved to cover her mouth. Standing outside the car door, an 'I'm going to lecture you within an inch of your lives' amused smile was Melody's father, jerking his head towards the house. Cheeks burning, Tommy helped Melody off of his lap, noticing that the driver's side window was fogged, the windshield barely holding on to a low opacity.

“Sorry, Papa.” 

Tommy didn't even bother trying to make an apology, slinking around her father to get into the house, making his way to the bathroom only to be stopped by his mother who smiled and tugged him towards the couch. Cursing a blue streak in his head, he quickly fell onto the couch next to her and pulled his shirt over his lap. He almost bolted when Melody's mother smiled and asked them about the dance, just thinking about it brought to mind the awkward conversation and his cheeks got hot as he took the cup from his mother's hand, taking a drink in a silent prod for Melody to do the talking.

If he'd known that the moment the women in the house were done talking about dances that it would lead to singing Christmas Carols he would have booked it, not that he was still suffering but he'd never been one for it. When his mother asked, he went with her to church and mouthed along, but they were actually expecting him to sing. The first time his voice cracked, Melody's dress sliding up her thighs as she tucked her legs beneath her before straightening the skirt, he slammed his mouth shut and sullenly refused to join.

All he could think about was sex, which was awkward because he was sitting next to his mother, doubly awkward because her parents were there as well. Jaw clenched, he tried to think about baseball, he'd heard that it worked, but then he started thinking about how good she'd sound singing the National Anthem, and then he started picturing her in some little slip that really did cover anyth- Clearing his throat, he ruthlessly pushed that away and tried to think of something else to try to not think about Melody. Desperately searching his mind for something he settled for their social studies teacher, feeling proud of himself as his blood started to cool, but then he remembered that Melody sat kitty corner to him in that class. Would hum softly and toy with the zipper of her sweater, and all he could think about was what if she wasn't playing with it but just pulling it down, letting it slide off of one shoulder...

“I need a drink!”

The unexpected outburst had four pairs of eyes staring at him, trying to puzzle out what had brought out the sudden declaration, the sound of notes from the piano still echoing in the air. All but throwing himself off the couch, he made his way into the kitchen, the flush that had just been on his cheeks earlier felt like it had spread all over. What he really wanted was a ice bath with cold water pouring down on him from the shower head. Unable to believe his luck that no one followed him into the kitchen, he all but crawled into the freezer once he opened it, a soft hiss coming from between clenched teeth as he pressed himself against the cold metal.

“Mrs. Golyn, the lady that always preaches on the corner by the store, um, fuck, _Mr_. Golyn. Oh that's fuckin' disgustin'!”

“What'd you find that got that reaction, Thomas?”

“Son of a-” Choking on the expletive, he looked around the door to see Melody's father staring at him confused. “Nothin', I, uh, my finger got stuck on the shelf for a bit.”

“Oh... Well your mother would like to say good night.”

“Yeah? Okay, just uh, give me a second I just decided on some orange juice.”

When he finally made it out to the living room the only person left was his mother, the others apparently going upstairs for light's out. Feeling guilty beneath the worried look his mother was sending his way, his mouth twitched into a grin as he helped her stand, wrapping his arms around her and muttering Merry Christmas. Her grasp wasn't as tight as it used to be, but he still made light coughing noises like she was squeezing the life out of him to make her laugh. 

Ten minutes later he was laying on the couch, the afghan haphazardly thrown over his lap when he heard Melody singing upstairs. All that hard work to cool his body meant nothing, his lips curling into a smile as he listened to her, pictured the dreamy smile on her lips, the way she'd be staring at nothing through her lashes. Dammit. Throwing the afghan aside, he threw himself off the couch and dug around behind the dining cabinet for her present, ignoring the incredulous inner voice that mocked him for being so transparent. Stairs taken two at a time, he crept down the hallway and gently twisted the door knob, slipping inside as he moved her present behind his back.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Explicit content ahead  
> Underage things of a pornographic nature

 “Tommy? What are you doing?”

“I just wanted to give you your present, I told you I didn't want to wait until tomorrow.” Fingers tightening their grip, he smiled even though he was having second thoughts on just how great the present was going to be. “Unless you don't care, in which case I suppose I can just not give it to you.”

“You can't take back Christmas presents!”

“Why not?”

He grinned as she slid off the bed, leaning back against the bedroom door, pinning the present there to free his hands to catch her wrists before she could reach around him. 

“Tommy, give me my present.”

“I already told you what it was. Earlier, remember?”

Her cheeks went red, her eyes widening as she stared at him, obviously putting in effort to keep herself from looking down. Letting her suffer for a moment, he finally relented and cracked a small smile, watching the comprehension dawn that he'd been teasing her. 

“You are mean.”

“Sometimes.” Shoulders rolling in a shrug, he pulled her flush against him to kiss her. “Now, do you want your present or not?”

The twist of her lips made him grin broadly, even as the nerves that had been a light buzz in the back of his mind suddenly burst loose to send his heart racing as his palms started to sweat. It had taken a while to get the things he'd needed, pictures, a copy of her hand print, and the more he thought about it the more he felt ridiculous. Realized the the gift was probably way too... mushy.

Melody's sudden inhale of air brought him out of his own head, blinking slowly as she stared down at the back of her guitar. The collage of pictures was sloppy, but he'd managed to scrounge up enough that the hand prints, both his and hers, were burnt into the wood. Silence drawing out, he started to think he might wind up in trouble for vandalizing the back of her guitar but then he couldn't breathe from her shoulder digging into his throat as she hugged him.

“So,” he coughed lightly, lifting his chin as he tried to get a better breath. “You're not mad about your guitar?”

“It's perfect.”

“You sure because I know how much you love that one so I was thinkin' that I'd just-”

“It's perfect.” She said again, her voice hoarse as she finally let go to stare at the pictures, her fingers skimming over the burned wood. “How'd you do this?”

“Um, your mom? She uh, she borrowed it to me while you were workin' on the tests the teachers handed out before break, and then she hid it for me.”

“I mean this.”

“Oh the hand prints, remember when we were paintin' my room? You put your hand on a piece of paper, I think it was when you were catching your balance cause we were goofin' off or somethin'.” Uncomfortable, even though he could tell she was beaming, he felt his smile return in reciprocation of hers despite the fact he wanted to run.

Tommy watched as she backed towards the bed, crossing her legs as she settled in the middle of it to tune the guitar before playing a few notes. Not knowing a damn thing about guitars other than they could fall over really quickly when bumped, he was glad that what he'd done as a gift hadn't ruined something Melody loved so much. Listening to her play, he amused himself by poking around her room, there wasn't nothing else to do until she'd satisfied the urge to play. Absently thumbing through one of the notebooks on her desk he realized that he was holding her song book, feeling something warm settle in his chest when he found the song that she'd written for him. 

Notes and lyrics were meticulously printed across the page, and several following it, not that he could make sense of it at all. Tossing it back on the desk, he started to turn and then stopped, tugging a piece of paper from beneath the stack the notebook had scattered. _Gift Ideas for Tommy_. He only made it half way down the list when it was snatched out of his hand and crumpled, Melody giving him an annoyed look as she pulled him away from the desk and pushed him towards the bed.

“I saw my name. Means I got rights to read it.”

“Nuh uh, that's not how that works.” Waiting until he settled with his back against the wall, she settled between his legs and picked up her guitar again. “Want to give it a try?”

“Again? No thanks, last time I was pretty sure I was going to end up breaking the thing.”

“You weren't that bad.”

Giving her a sour look that she couldn't see, he settled his hands on her hips as he settled his chin on her shoulder. Bad hadn't covered it, to be honest he hadn't been entirely sure that a guitar could make some of the sounds he'd managed to pull out of it before finally getting at least the basics down. That didn't mean he wanted to try again, ever. Watching her fingers lightly brush over the strings, Tommy grinned and nuzzled the skin just under her ear.

“If you show me how to get up off the ground,” Melody frowned, the notes hesitant before she continued, though she didn't smile. “I can show you how to fly and never ever come back down.”

“You alright?”

“Yeah, I was working on this before my guitar mysteriously went missing.”

“It's a bit,” he struggled before giving up when he couldn't find the word he was looking for. “It's different.”

“That's because it's not supposed to be played on an acoustic.”

He watched as she flung herself off the bed, flicking through CDs before finally putting one into her stereo, then jumped back onto the bed. Swallowing back a groan, he wrapped his arms around her while he waited for the disc to start, trying to ignore the way she was squirming as she tried to get comfortable. It wasn't helping that he knew all she was wearing beneath the oversized shirt, one that she'd stolen from his closet, was a pair of panties. He'd gotten a glimpse of the cover when she'd opened the case, and reluctantly prepared himself for what he assumed was going to be another girl thing, though Melody insisted that ballads weren't just for girls. 

What he got instead surprised him, his hands going still, pleasantly surprised that he wasn't being tortured on a holiday. Then he actually paid attention to the lyrics and his attention returned to Melody so quickly he suffered mental whiplash. The smile on her lips was almost smug, but there was too much uncertainty swarming in her eyes that he couldn't bother to try getting offended.

“Subtle.” He finally said, confused when her hands slid behind him before his mouth fell open at what she came back with.

Tommy eyed the foil, felt his mouth go dry, hands slipping off her hips. He hadn't thought she was serious, or at the very least would have changed her mind, but apparently he'd been very wrong on both counts. Kissing her when she leaned forward to brush her lips over his, he felt a mild sort of panic start in his chest, his fingers balling the blanket in his hands as she rested hers on his shoulders.

It couldn't be that hard, right? And it wasn't like he didn't know how it worked, or how they would get there. But the idea of it, the fantasizing, was very different from having the opportunity within reach. A low groan escaped him when Melody rolled her hips against his, fingers dipping beneath the hem of the shirt to grip them, pulling her tight against him and letting out a hushed moan at the friction. This part he knew, the tips of his fingers digging in, his tongue tangling with hers, grinning when she let out a moan as he lifted his hips to scoot down the bed to lay flat beneath her. Smoothing his palms over her hips, he pushed her shirt up her back before getting his hands free to tangle in her hair, squirming when strands of it tickled his ear from where parts of it still hung down like dark vines.

Staring up at her confused when she pulled back, he blinked slowly when she pulled her shirt up and over her head, his hands slowly moving up her thighs to stall at the bottom of her ribs. He'd been right about her not wearing much beneath it, giving her a light push to move her back so he could curl his torso and pull his off as well. After he finally managed to untangle himself from the fabric, he noticed that she'd crossed her arms, nervously toying with her lower lip with her chin tilted so her hair hid her face.

“We don't have to.”

“No, I want to.” Tommy watched as she went completely still before letting her arms slowly drop, though she still wasn't meeting his eyes. “You want to right?”

“Yeah, yeah I want to.”

It took effort to stop staring at her half naked body, sitting up to kiss her again, his hands settling on her hips because he still wasn't entirely sure what he wanted to do with them. He wasn't prepared for the bruising pressure that the kiss turned into, Melody's fingers gripping his shoulders hard enough her nails felt like they were almost breaking skin. Running his hands along her back he pulled back and caught her gaze, licking his lower lip to check for blood even as he continued stroking her back soothingly. 

“You good?”

“Yeah I- … You don't wish I was Jessica, do you?” 

“Who?” The sudden question left him reeling, though he couldn't make his hands stop moving even if he wanted to, sliding them up to cup her shoulder blades. 

“The one you were thinking about kissing.”

“I never said I- Oh. Oh, c'mon I was kiddin'.”

Not entirely sure what he'd missed, or why she was bringing up Jessica Dunstan, Tommy let out a soft huff of annoyance. It wasn't until he tried to roll his shoulders that he realized that Melody had yet to lighten her grip, glancing at her hands to see that the knuckles were almost white. 

“Alright, seriously, we don't have to do this. If you're scared-” the sentence cut off abruptly when Melody snapped her head up to stare at him, daring him to finish, which he no longer felt like doing. “This might be easier if you were on bottom, so you don't think as much.”

Easier said than done, they both almost went sprawling on the floor, forgetting that they'd been on the edge. It helped though, the laughter at the almost embarrassing moment relaxing Melody, her arms moving to wrap around Tommy's shoulders to pull him down for a kiss. Happy to have avoided the unforeseen discussion, he turned his attention to enjoying just how much of her skin he was able to touch, haltingly smoothing a hand up her side before finally palming her breast for the first time without a layer of clothing in the way. Hesitating when she went still, he moved his hand and lightly nipped her lower lip only to freeze when she grabbed his wrist and put his hand back.

It only took him a moment to shove his pajama bottoms down, shivering slightly as the band dragged along his cock before finally getting them down around his knees to kick them off. The fact that Melody had never seen him naked didn't occur to him until she broke the kiss with a startled gasp when her legs wrapped around his thighs and realized they were bare. Smile tinged with more than a bit of uncertainty, Tommy held still, even his breath catching in his lungs, as her hand slid off his shoulder and slid downwards. His head fell to her shoulder with a groan when her fingers lightly skimmed the head, hips jerking forward of their own accord, then again when she tentatively wrapped her fingers around it. Bright flashes of light obscured his vision when she squeezed, grabbing her wrist to stop her.

“Sorry!”

“Wh- No, I just-” Muttering beneath his breath, he took in air slowly and let it just as slow, shivers chasing themselves over his skin, heat racing down his spine. “I don't want it to be over til it's over, y'know?”

“Oh, okay.” She didn't stop though, squeezing again experimentally before stroking upwards, leaving Tommy to grit his teeth as his hips rolled shamelessly. “It doesn't hurt though?”

The chuckle that escaped him was tinged with hysteria, though the sound was choked when Melody squeezed a bit too hard sending conflicting signals throughout his body. When he finally managed to catch his breath he gingerly trailed his fingers over her stomach only to pause at the band before dipping beneath. Stroking her, and grinding his palm against her, was completely different when she was still wearing jeans than what his fingers encountered as they trailed over the slit. He wasn't ready for her thighs to attempt slamming closed as he dipped the tip of his middle finger between the lips, his mouth opening wordlessly when her hand tightened again before he had the chance to realize what she might do.

“Mel!” Name hissed between clenched teeth, he slowly released the breath that he'd caught, twisting his wrist to try getting farther when Melody's hips lifted off the bed. 

Not entirely sure what had caused the reaction he went still, feeling the muscles clenched around his hips shiver as he blindly flicked his finger again. His hand covered her mouth as his eyes went wide, stifling the sound and feeling eternally grateful that the guitar solo hit its peak at the same time. Slowly moving his hand away from her mouth, he cupped her knee and pushed until she slowly opened them again, his palm smoothing over her thigh. Curling his finger, he grinned when her hand flew to her mouth, teeth biting into her knuckles. The passing thought that there should be more porn about first times, he slowly slid his middle finger inside, blinking slowly at the wet heat surrounding it before focusing on Melody's face.

He didn't know much, but he'd heard enough stories that the first time hurt, a lot apparently, and given that his finger felt like it was in a vice he figured he could understand why. Stroking slowly, he braced his other hand on the bed near her head and kissed her, trying to multitask and still be careful as he added a second finger. There was no fucking way he was going to fit, not that he was heavenly blessed or anything but it was so fucking tight.

“Tommy?” Eyes flying open, his lips twitched upwards on the right side as he realized that he'd said that out loud. “It's alright, Tommy.”

Unconvinced, he curled his fingers and watched Melody's back arch, her hands grasping his forearm, the nails scraping as he rubbed the heel of his palm over her clit. That was easy, he remembered the spot from times when they made out and he got away with sliding his hand between her legs to feel the heat, the way it spread up his arm as she moaned into his mouth. She wasn't moaning now, her breath coming in uneven hitches, shoving at his arm as she whined in the back of her throat.

“Stop, stop.” Worried that he'd somehow managed to hurt her, he did, opening his mouth to apologize only to watch her shiver before patting the bed and practically throwing the unopened condom at him. “Not yet, okay? I want- … You know what I mean, just... Oh my God...”

Staring down at the condom in his palm, he nodded, fumbling to get he packaging open and then hesitated at the husky smell that met his nose. He almost jumped out of his skin when Melody scooted closer, biting down on the inside of her lower lip before lifting her hips to press against him. Condom momentarily forgotten he stared down at Melody as he lowered his body before rolling his hips and swallowing a curse. The rough, slick glide felt so good it hurt, his stomach tightening as he did it again and again, covering Melody's mouth with his own when the soft whimpers transitioned into a moan.

Her hands shoving at his chest were ignored, too busy focusing on fighting back the release that was clawing at his insides. When he finally did notice, he stopped, panting as he stared down at her confused, a grunted expletive escaping him when he saw that she'd pulled the condom from the foil. Muscles shaking he made a move to take it before shaking his head, mutely asking for a minute. He didn't get it, the impatient girl reaching down to palm him and getting the condom only halfway on when Tommy lost it, his hips rocking forward with a hoarse shout.

Freezing beneath him, Melody stared up at him with wide eyes, her mouth falling open to ask the inane question before she caught herself. She tried to slide the condom off, the same way she'd put it on and froze again when Tommy choked on air as he tried to form the word stop. Razored lightning raced up his spine when she squeezed him curiously, his fingers gathering blanket in his clenched fists, as he shook his head. Face flushed with a healthy dose of embarrassment, he finally managed a steady breath, reaching down to pull off the condom with a soft grunt.

“Sorry.”

“It's okay.”

He could feel her staring at him, her hands smoothing up over his chest and down again as got his breathing under control. It wasn't alright, it was embarrassing. Muttering the word fuck under his breath, he avoided meeting her eyes as his fingers clumsily attempted tying the latex into a knot before finally succeeding. Latex dropped into the waste basket by her bed, he went stiff when she slid her hands to cup his jaw, pulling him back and down for a kiss.

“I'm sure it happens all the time, Tommy. Stop being so upset.”

A soft sound of disgust escaped him, but that didn't stop him from kissing her back when she tried again, lifting one of his knees to straddle her thigh. Her nails dug into the nape of his neck, and he grinned realizing that she assumed he was trying to climb off the bed to sulk. Curving his spine, he brushed against her groin and was pleased to get a gasp in response, her sudden inhale sucking the air from his mouth making something pop.

“Hey, Tommy?”

“Hmm?” Sliding a hand beneath her, he bit his lower lip as she shamelessly ground against his thigh before flushing and coming to a stop.

“Was that it? I mean, you can go again, right?”

“Oh, um, yeah I just, I need a minute.”


End file.
